JJW Photography Blog

Bravery Beyond Measure

2012-02-01T21:04:00.000-06:00

Brave or daring, crazy or full of life describes Dannika during our Florida adventure. She got to go parasailing not once, but TWICE! She loved it so much she talked her Grandma into going up with her again.

brav·er·y

1. brave spirit or conduct; courage; valor.

2. showiness; splendor; magnificence.

Then, we are spending a day at Blizzard Beach and I see Devan and my little girl going down this type of pulley and when one reaches the end they are "thrown" into the water. No fear for this girl. She loved this, too!

She could spend hours in the water, no problem. I seriously doubt she would ever be done and ready to leave. She played all by herself, or found a friend, or with her siblings. It didn't matter to her, as long as sh was in or by the water.

The boys all spent a day at Universal Studios where I opted to stay outside of the parks with the girls and save ourselves a TON of money! Dannika played in this water fountain thing forever. She played with a girl about her age from Venezuela for an extremely long time until both girls were soaking wet and smiling from ear to ear. It did not matter that they could not even speak to each other. The family spoke little to no English - yet the world of children seems to know no barriers. It was amazing and beautiful.

AND - when Destiny would go off to pout, who would rescue her little sister? Dannika would. She would hoist her up on her back to give her a piggy back ride and Destiny would forget what she was even angry or upset about. These girls - best of friends.

Honestly, I watch this girls fearlessness and feel so proud and scared and happy and sad all at the same time. She lives her life to the fullest, no doubt. Some may say she needs to, because we know her life MAY be shortened from this Cystic Fibrosis disease, but to the mom, that is scary. We should all live our lives to the fullest, and I try. I may not feel the need to risk my life parasailing or giving myself a heart attack on roller coasters, but I'm trying to live each day to the fullest, to do all God has designed for me in that day, to remember to thank him for life and breath and all the blessings in between. We all should, regardless of our individual diseases or downfalls or aches and pains, but it's not always so easy. I look at this girl and sometimes feel like crying. She is so beautiful and full of spirit and sweetness. She is everything God intended her to be, with CF.

Ocean Creatures!

2012-01-30T21:48:00.000-06:00

I'm still longing for 80 degree weather! As promised, some of Dyllan's finds are in these pictures. We managed to get one picture with Shaine and one with me. Eeeks!

I'm trying to get more pictures of myself with the kids - hard to do when I'm the one always holding the camera. AND - I don't necesarilly like pictures of my myself. You know how that is? Destiny's face here is too funny. She displayed some serious attitude on our trip! Made me re-question many of my parenting skills, that's for sure.

Dyllan found a real live starfish, in the ocean! Super cool looking!

Here is some more true attitude! I think if one more person told us how "cute" she was, I was going to scream. She was getting very good at saying thank you in her most polite voice, but how can all that not go to her head. Seriously, it is unreal! AND - I have found that African American people are totally drawn to her. YES - caucasions, too, but I do believe she just catches the eye of African Americans. We saw lots of pouting - quick mood swings - and lots of true "stubborn" girl! She would often times be trailing behind because she was mad about something. I never know if I should just walk away and leave her and wait for her to catch up or grab her and MAKE her come with. She seems to have no fear of being left - until she can't see us, but then I can't see her either and that makes me too nervous. This girl tries my parenting skills, that's for sure, but she is such a sweetie in the next second. We are for sure still a work in progress. All of us are, really~

The girls got to spend a bit of time at the Surf Club at our Ft. Lauderdale Hotel and they had a suffable plushable activity where they got to shove a whole bunch of stuffing into an animal. They loved it. AND - now I have two more stuffed animals to deal with at my house. Lovely!

She had to have PINK!!! Yes, a pink flamingo!

Ocean Fever

2012-01-29T22:20:00.000-06:00

I wish I was back there again! Ft. Lauderdale, FL - never been there before, but we sure did have a blast! The weather was absolutely gorgeous! 80+ degrees every day. This was taken the very first afternoon we arrived and the kids were excited to see the ocean. I thought it would be way too cold to swim, but apparantly, I should have let them put their suits on right away!

It seemed as if they were soaking wet within seconds. They loved every minute of it.

This may be one of my favorites of Destiny. Her beauty is so simply stunning. AND - she had gotten so many compliments on this trip and got quite good at saying thank you to all the people telling her how pretty/ cute/ adorable/ she was. Her attitude is NOT always that adorable, but ... with a smile like this - that attitude part is easy to forget.

Devan and Dyllan got right into the water as well. I did not manage to capture a good picture of Dyllan this time, as he was off doing his own sorting and discovering. There were a ton of seashells to capture and even a few sea creatures that I got some great pictures of. Coming soon, I promise!

AND - we decided we should go put swimsuits on!

Destiny is getting to be quite the little model with all her posing!

Dannika was having the time of her life! She is a water NUT! I have decided our next family vacation is for sure going to be a beach vacation and we are doing "nothing" planned besides hanging out at the beach. I'm on the hunt for a great location. If anyone has hints of places to go/stay/rent let me know!

AND this girl was amazing on our trip. I have a whole post on her to write, but besides everyone getting a little overtired and cranky, the trip was a blast. I am so glad we just DID it. I will admit I am ready for a mom and dad vacation now though.

The Way We Were

2012-01-25T21:25:00.000-06:00

We used to take vacations and have to SEE IT ALL. We used to want to fit in every bit of the city or location that we could. We used to want to use all the available time we had to do all we possibly could. Not anymore! I have decided we pretty much have become the worst family vacationers ever, IF we are going by the SEE IT ALL standards I had previously set out for myself and our family.

We seem to be more of the try to ENJOY EVERY MOMENT kind of family. We have been "vacationing" in Florida. I really love this place until I try to go somewhere and can't find a parking spot or have to wait in line for more than 10 minutes. Then, I long for good old South Dakota once again. The worst is trying to watch fireworks at Magic Kingdom, when really there is not a "bad" seat in the house, but some people think they have to inch their way up to block your view, getting themselves a few inches closer to the action. Blah! That's when I long for the wide open spaces of South Dakota. This family seems to go to one attraction, then we need food for someone, or a bathroom for someone else, and then we need to decide where to go next and then we may catch one more attraction if we are lucky before having to start the whole process over again. We are just slow!!

Today, we wanted to enjoy Universal Studios. The boys seem to be almost "too old" for Disney World, if that is EVER a possibility. The bigger rides at Universal seem to be more their style. So, we all headed out to Universal this morning and both of the girls wanted to be carried as we walked from our parking spot to the park. Hmmm, that makes me think we will NEVER make the day work. As we are waiting in line to pay an astronomical amount of money to feel sick to your stomach from the ups and downs of roller coasters, I decide that perhaps the girls should just wait for the daring brothers and their dad. We saved a lot of money and I don't think they were feeling up to it today. So, we left them and enjoyed an hour of chasing and feeding the seagulls. Then, the girls played in the shooting water for another hour. Then, we checked out the movie times and really we just played. We even got to see the Despicable Me minions as they climbed aboard a boat! Pretty much a "wasted day" in my old way of thinking. In my new way of thinking - we loved every minute. We even got to see the movie, Joyful Noise, which we loved. We finished up at the parks around 5:00 and headed back to our hotel to swim in the hotel pool and order pizza. Finally, we have them all tucked in and asleep. Whew. I am worn out and what did I do today? Nothing - really, but I smiled more today and enjoyed more today and thanked God more today and watched my girls be kids! That's worth more than a thousand full days of seeing the sights. Watching Dannika feed those sea gulls cookie crumbs because she really was convinced she could pet a seagull was priceless. She almost did it, too, but they just were too leary. Watching the girls giggle in the water and go from just touching their toes to the water to being fully drenched - hillarious. So, I'm going to continue to try to enjoy every breath with these kiddos God has entrusted me to love and care for and teach. Hopefully, I will be rejuvinated tomorrow, for they will be ready to go get 'em again.

Ice Fishing in SD

2012-01-17T23:54:00.000-06:00

Our First EVER ice fishing trip was a week ago and I must admit, it was a little bit fun! The kids had a blast and even caught fish. As we were heading home this was the beautiful sunset, straight out of the camera, without any editing, I promise. It was pure beauty!

Dannika had no fear of any fish at all. She really enjoyed it out there and would have stayed all day if her feet didn't get a little bit cold.

Destiny was not so sure about the whole fish thing, but after seeing her big sister hold it, she was not going to be outdone. If Dannika does it, she can too!

Devan had to show us the ropes. He had gone ice fishing with his buddy Connor before. Thanks so much to Connor and his dad for showing us how it is done! Now, the boys think they need all the ice fishing gear. I would need the heated house on the ice before I am brave enough to try again. This day was simply gorgous, as warm as it can be and still have ice, but my feet still got cold. I know, I am not great it cold weather AT ALL!

Dyllan was right at home out there. He is our fisherman in the family I do believe. He could sit out there for hours, which really surprises me, but he always seems to catch the most fish as well.

Destiny thought the ice was pretty cool. We went sliding around and even fell a few times. No bruises though.

Dannika wanted to take a picture of us and she did a great job - wrinkles and all.

The scene as we left was just picture perfect. I have said before that I really like to photograph people much more than scenery, but ... I may be changing. This scene just struck me!

My Gymnasts

2012-01-14T12:22:00.000-06:00

We are still in gymnastics once a week in Watertown. The girls just love it. It is not the competitive class, but rather a rec class. I just think it is great exercise and hopefully they will gain strength and coordination.

This was a Parent's Night and I LOVE Destiny's BIG stretch! She looks so proud!

She looks so big here. Almost a four year old...

Look at those knees! I think we could have used some lotion. After crawling around in the gym they look a little dry.

Love her precious smile! It has been fun to watch her progress in the last four years.

Oh - determination!

And my favorite! What a precious site.

Baby Kate

2012-01-09T17:12:00.000-06:00

Can you tell I had SOOO much fun taking pictures of the TINY baby Kate! She was a trooper and slept the entire time. I take that back, she did fuss for about 2 seconds, and then was soothed again. I have NEVER gotten so many adorable pictures of an infant this size before in one sitting. The trick... we were sweating. I turned up the heat to 82 degrees, yes, 82! It was the ticket! So, my advise for getting the best baby pictures - of a sleeping baby that is - sweat it out!

As you can see it was hard for me to choose a favorite!

Dance Highlights

2012-01-07T08:16:00.000-06:00

Dannika participated in a dance class for the past few months and LOVED it! There is a new dance studio about 15 minutes from our house, which is amazing~ We went over one evening a week for one hour. Here is her group ready to perform over in Clark! So cute!

Here is the group with the instructors, Morgan Bratland on the left and her mom, Holly on the right. These two made it so much fun for the girls. Their patience is valued by all! Thanks to a great first session of dance.

Here is Morgan with Dannika. Dannika just loves this girl.

And Morgan is so popular a few more girls got in for a picture!

And a few of my precious girl!~ Dannika really had a great time meeting more friends and learning a new routine. The second session starts in February, but we are still debating. This is where it is hard for me to exercise my new 2012 Resolutions and say no to something I so LOVE, but it requires another night away and out and makes us "busy." SO - the jury is still out on that decision. We are still doing gymnastics on Tuesdays, and I would LOVE to make a more dedicated effort to go to Wednesday night youth groups and church. It is just a much needed reminder that God is still in control in the middle of my week. It makes ME refocus and regroup, but it is just hard to give up another night. Perhaps my priorities were wrong to think dance would be better than youth group? So hard to make these mom decisions. I struggle.

Cousins

2012-01-04T13:11:00.000-06:00

I did manage to take a very FEW pictures of my family Christmas Celebrations! These are the cousins, who don't get together nearly enough, but they do look so cute all together. Why is it so hard to find time to just be together?

I don't live all that far away from my brother and his family or my dad- only 35-40 minutes, but it sure does seem like a long ways to just go and hang out together. Funny how that works. Life gets busy and there are activities for kids and work and - and - and... Trying to reprioritize some of those things for 2012 and let's see if I can do a better job of setting aside TIME to spend with those we love. I may have to become an entertainer. I am not really one to invite people over. I am not a planner in any way. I love it when people just show up, but we have rarely been home, so I can't count on that either. I am going to start inviting people over, I HOPE! I'm going to try, and see if it pans out. NOW, the problem is other people have to have some free time on their hands as well. Not always easy. Wish me luck!!! I may need it!!

These two share the same birthday! When Destiny first came to our family she was smaller than Mylee. Not anymore! Now, Mylee is tiny compared to Destiny. Wondering just how tall my girl will be!! AND - she is loving to RUN! She tires like no other - not at all!!! I'm going to have to start letting her run laps around the house I guess!

Ringing in 2012

2012-01-01T21:29:00.000-06:00

Welcoming in 2012 means time to reflect on last year and make some New Year's Resolutions. I am not big on resolutions I can't keep. I always have a wish list, but some things I am certainly more committed to than others. Here are a few of my wishes for 2012:

1. Enjoy every minute! Sometimes I am so guilty of the "rushed" life. Seriously, in this day and age, who isn't? I want to not be in a hurry all the time. I want to take a few moments each day to smell the flowers, look for shapes in the clouds, enjoy the fresh air of South Dakota, and enjoy all my blessings!

2. Love on my family and devote a little more TIME to just being WITH them all. Dannika asked the other night if we could do a separate date night with each of the kids, and I think that is an amazing idea. I really want to try to give each child undivided attention from BOTH Shaine and I. I am hoping it will improve some of the relationships and make each child a little more respectful and let us discover more positives about each child. I also want to get in a few more date nights with just that dear husband of mine. And, this may lead to Number 3.

3. Say NO a little more often. Yup, you read that one right. That may mean not as many activities that the kids are begging to do. That may mean saying no to a Bible Study here and there OR saying No to Friends and Family. Who knows. I have tried to pull back a little more this past year and I really feel like I need to pull back even more. I am NOT the kind of parent who wants to ENTERTAIN my children 100% of the time. That means they need time to do their own things at HOME. That means they must discover books and things to play all by themselves. I am guilty of always wanting to DO SOMETHING on our free days, but I find that makes my children expect to be constantly entertained. NO MORE! I want them to relish those fun outings, not expect them. I want them to remember and reminisce and think back and talk about those fun times, not want to do more the very next day.

4. I want to read my Bible more. I do find that when I do this, I am more calm, more cool, and more collected. I find comfort in God's words and need that in my life. When things get too busy, guess what it the first to go? YES - my time reading the Bible. My time with Him. That needs to be the very last thing to go. I know that, but for some reason I need that reminder oh so often.

5. I want my children to fight less. I know, this one may be a big old pipe dream. I wonder how those families do it where their children all seem to get along and be the best of friends and enjoy each others' company. Yes, I do see this in my children - maybe more than I admit. I guess the bad always seems to outweigh the good. As I type this, my boys are playing a computer game together in the same room, and there is no fighting!!! The girls are tucked in bed and have not come up once, in hopes of a treasure from the treasure box in the morning! Yes, I have resorted to bribery in the "staying in bed" area. It works! For now! Sometimes, I just have to go with that!

6. Get a little more healthy? Hey, if I'm wishing I might as well wish big! I want to start and finish an exercise program. I am thinking we will set up my studio as an exercise gym, and still have the studio, but just organize a little more and use our space wisely!

7. UN-CLUTTER my life! This is a biggie! I need to take a few days off and just SORT the junk in my home and in my studio. I am getting much better in the clothing department. If I don't wear it in one year - it's out! Why save it? No way! Now, I just need to continue that into the kitchen, the kids' rooms, the closet full of junk, etc. Then, I always have the issue of what to do with it all after the sorting? I have one side of my garage full for the next rummage sale, but that is also such a pain. Once it is all marked and sorted, I love it. Getting to that point, very time consuming. Perhaps I am better off to load it up and donate it all, but I have found some great ways to help some very wonderful families with my rummage sales. Hmmmm - first to the uncluttering and then on the that issue!

8. This one is an important one: CURE CF!!! This last year has been a bit stressful for me in the health department for our family. Dannika was diagnosed in May and fights daily with Cystic Fibrosis, the snot disease as some kids have called it! We are getting used to the treatments, but not the quickness of this awful disease. It really is the silent disease. One day she seems so healthy we forget for a moment she has it, and then, the next day may bring a fever and a little more coughing. So far, we have avoided any hospital visits, and I am praying daily for healing of those lungs. Keep them strong and healthy, and praying for a CURE, not only for us, but for the many who suffer from this disease!

9. Hoping to be raising these four kiddos to the best of my ability! Some days I wonder - and some days I am astounded by the great and wonderful individuals God has entrusted us with! We are so blessed!

Wishing you all a very blessed and wonderful 2012!

The Girl With the Red Purse

2011-12-29T08:04:00.000-06:00

Santa did come to our house. This year bringing an array of littler gifts, some much needed and some so not. Many have toyed and written about the idea of not having Santa anymore at their house, but we still "believe."

What a cute crew? All feeling back to normal and healthy! Yay for that!

And.... for my BEST present! I slowly opened the box and saw COACH!~ Now, this may be my favorite company ever. OK, maybe not, but I love a great Coach purse. I love the feel of it, the smell of it and can't wait to tear into the box.

And this is what I saw......

And this is what I said.... "It's RED!"

Some of you may be thinking so what? If you truly know me you may know that I never wear red. I don't own any red clothes, red accessories, or anything red. My poor husband was convinced that this was the exact purse I had wanted. (Nope..) I had received a postcard in the mail from Coach in October? I had mentioned to Shaine that I really liked the purse on the cover of it. He sort of looked at it - it was a burnt orange color, not RED! When he went to the Coach store he simply asked for the purse on the postcard that was mailed out. Well, the saleslady got so excited and spoke of all the great benefits of this red purse and my husband and oldest son left feeling like they had the perfect gift. Now, my reaction set them back a bit - sorry for that~ I was just a bit shocked at the glaring RED! Shaine gave me the receipt and said I could exchange it, but now it is sort of growing on me and the story simply makes me smile.

Christmas Eve Pictures

2011-12-28T10:16:00.000-06:00

I am on the ball this morning with a few of the Christmas Eve Pictures I promised. The first is just the ONE lonely sick Dyllan picture. He was such a trooper though - coming to open presents with the rest of us. He is not back to his wonderful self!

Devan got a few FUN presents - this one is a break-away hoop for his bedroom door. I was hoping it would put an end to the playing basketball in my sunroom - but NOPE! No such luck there.

I'm going to have a contest to see who can guess what Dannika's gift is??? It's a tricky one! If you think you know - leave it in a comment and a prize will be coming - depending on where you live. I'm going to be mailing it - OR delivering it. Homemade laundry soap IF you live close by and if you are far away - a few great scrapbooking supplies, paper and stickers and ???

Destiny was excited to get a Barbie fishing rod from her brother!

The following are from Grandma and Grandpa Weelborg's house where we got together for a fun afternoon and evening!!

My two girls - best friends forever I think!

Devan and his sister - what a cute couple of kids!!

This is the whole crew, besides Dyllan! So bummed he could not be there for the annual BIG picture. I guess now we are just going to have to get them all together again!!! Baby Parker is also missing in action, that would be Larry and Jackie's newest addition!!

Dannika and her cousin, Kami. These two are in the same grade and LOVE getting together to play. They have become recess buddies as school, as they are not in the same class. AND - Dannka is super excited to spend some time with Kami over Christmas break!

I do believe anybody who has Dannika for a friend is the luckiest person! She amazes me daily with her heart of gold and her patience and sweet personality. I am so blessed to be this little punkin's Mama! On a health note: her CF doctor put her on 10 extra days of her strong Cipro antibiotic, but today is day 14 and I am stopping them. Dannika broke out in a slight rash last night, which may NOT have anything to do with the antibiotic, but ... I don't think she needs them anymore. We go down for her appointment January 5th and I would rather have her get a true reading than one doped on Cipro. Maybe that's a bad call on my part, but 20 days of Cipro is a LOT for her little body to endure. She is back to her "normal" and has been for about 3-4 full days now. I'm just following my mom instinct and saying that is enough. Praying that is the right instinct to follow!

Don't forget about the contest! Guess Dannika' present in the picture!!

Christmas 2011

2011-12-27T12:18:00.000-06:00

It has passed. I have survived. It was a wonderful Christmas, minus one sick child. We spent Christmas Eve at Shaine's parents house - and Dyllan stayed home sick. That seemed to put a damper on my Christmas Eve, but we still had some fun. Dyllan finally started feeling better about 8:00 pm when we arrived home. So, I did not take many pictures, it just seemed wrong without him there. Then, Devan and I looked at each other and I asked if this was going to be what it was like when Dyllan goes to college - we both decided we didn't like it so much. Thanks to Shaine's parents for such a wonderful meal and a great time.
Christmas Day was a HOME DAY!!! We just enjoyed each other's company after the Santa presents were opened, watched a few movies and played with toys. I love days like that! I love the relaxed pace and just being together. The best!
Yesterday we got to entertain a tiny bit for my close family. My brother and his family and my dad came down and I might have to say it was one of the most relaxing Christmas times ever. We just hung out and talked and watched kids play. We did get our annual Oyster Stew too!! I did some very minimal Christmas baking before they came. I made carmel Puffcorn popcorn and Peanut Blossom Cookies. Now - I need to diet!
I, personally, seemed to just try to enjoy more, stress less, and just go with the flow. I have seriously been thinking I am becoming VERY APATHETIC over things that may have drove me crazy in the past. So - my new WHATEVER attitude is sort of growing on me. I like it! So, if I don't return your messages or emails or phone calls, don't worry - I am just turning over a new leaf! Haha!
I will add some pictures later, I did take a few snapshots - not too many this year. Sometimes it is just nice to BE - rather than living life through a camera!

Monday Mayhem

2011-12-19T10:52:00.000-06:00

I snapped a quick picture with my phone when Destiny and Dannika were practicing for their church Christmas Program. Destiny cracked us up. She knew all the actions to the two songs they sang and she was quite upset that the little kids did not get to sing Silent Night with the others. She had been practicing with her CD and thought she knew it!! So much fun! The program was actually two weekends ago and it turned out that Dannika had the flu and missed her part in the program. We did get to watch from the back until Devan got done with his part then I left with my sick girl. So - just had to share my one cute picture. I did not get any others, so if anyone has some to share and I'm on the hunt for a video as well. I am sure the church has some - just have to get one, since I didn't even get to see the whole thing.

I titled this blog post Monday Mayhem because my Monday is especially crazy today. Why? I don't even know. The weekend was wonderful. We celebrated Christmas yesterday with the big Weelborg family and had a fun time. The kids enjoyed playing together and "getting to know" all their cousins. It seems like they don't get together very much, even though we are all fairly close. People are just too busy I guess.

This morning I got up and started my day and looked at my disaster of a house. I try to pick up and get a load of laundry going before I leave for the day. I had two baskets of girls clothes to put away and the boys' rooms are still a disaster from our basement flood, so just going downstairs makes me nauseous. I really HATE being in a mess!! I just hate starting out my day feeling this overwhelming need to clean up! Anyone else do that?

THEN - I see my 11 year old standing around, asking if I will be able to help him study tonight as he has three tests tomorrow. Now, I am not sure if I have talked about Devan very much on my blog, but he is an organized studying fool! He likes to be very prepared for tests and such. He did not bring books home this weekend to study from and had no worksheets handed back yet. So, we have to do it tonight. I love it that he cares. I love it that he wants to do well. I love it that he is not satisfied with an A-, but strives to do the very best he can. BUT - when my 11 year old stands there asking for my help with big crocodile tears slipping down his cheek that he thinks I didn't notice, yikes!!! I know both Shaine and I were the exact same way. I think I was more of a procrastinator than Shaine, but perhaps not. That was a LONG time ago! That is also a lot of pressure for this young man! Devan also has to finish reading a book by Thursday and take an AR test on it which he must pass as he needs 6 more points for this quarter. Last night he climbed in bed with me and asked if I would read with him. I LOVE to read with my kids and it is a VERY RARE occasion that he even wants to read. As it turns out he HAD to get it done! Reading is not his favorite thing in the whole world. He will never just pick up a book for fun. He would way rather play basketball or fly a remote control airplane or tease his sister. There are so many other options that appeal to him much more than reading! Needless to say, I talked to him about starting to read BEFORE the week it is due. Hopefully, that will work for next quarter. We will be studying Social Studies AND Science tonight and hoping we can get through it all to his satisfaction. Wish me luck in the studying department. I thought I was past that chapter of my life, but apparently not. It is starting all over again!

Nose Issues

2011-12-14T16:03:00.000-06:00

I have to giggle with this picture. It is almost ironic. I remember looking through my mom's old pictures and there is a picture of her doing this same thing to a statue when my mom and dad were on a trip or maybe honeymoon? This lovely act was Destiny's idea and then both girls joined in for a picture. I guess Destiny is a girl after her Grandma's heart even if she is not biologically related and will never meet her here on this earth! I so wish my mom could have met her, because their humor is so alike - even at her young age!~

I also need to say, "I may have spoke too soon." Dannika seems to have her own nose issues today! We missed school because she is simply worn out and coughing non-stop. I finally caved in and called her CF doctor and am awaiting a call back to see if they prescribe something or ??? Just when I think we may have this CF thing figured out another wave hits.

That's the thing with this disease. It's a silent thing and when I least expect it, it shows its' ugliness. Great! She may have picked up some other god only knows bacteria that is reeking havoc in there OR maybe it is simply a cold? That's the other thing with CF, I just never know. Then, I wonder if other CF moms take their kids to the "regular" clinic or "regular" family practice doctor or just call and go see the special CF doctor all the time? I called the CF doctor. I really don't know... I'm anxious to see what he says and where we go from here, although I have LOVED our day at home together, she is simply worn out from coughing!

Christmas Surprise

2011-12-13T10:22:00.000-06:00

I am busy editing pictures today and had to share a few fun ones from an "At Home Session" I did the other day. Precious baby toes always make me smile!

And Abigail is one of my favorite little girls to photograph. I have watched her grow up and she is just too cute. Her expressions are "Pure Abigail" as her mom says!

And this last one just makes me laugh - a lot! There are others of the two of them together that look more "precious," but the expression on the older sister's face is almost deadly and then the candy cane just looks like a weapon. Watch out Mama - these two could turn your hair gray!! Actually, they were both very good kids.

I don't do many in the home sessions with people. Lighting is just sometimes too hard to control and I don't like hauling all my huge lighting equipment - ugh! I don't love on-camera flash for portraits, so mom scoped out the light in her home and I was so impressed. I really loved the session. It was more relaxed for a new baby, even though we had a few screams. An Anne Geddes photographer I am not - I think the temperature had lots to do with it. The heat was turned up, but seriously, I think adults have to be sweating to get babies to sleep like angels while naked. Just my thoughts. While clothes, this little Allison zonked out. When unclothed - yikes! Even her screaming pictures are cute though. Babies just can't be bad! They are miracles!!

Contentment

2011-12-12T10:40:00.000-06:00

Phillipians 4:11 Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.

NOT!!!!! I am working on it. I will be working on it and I will probably always be working on it. I am not the most "content" person in the world. Are you? I guess I am always pushing and wanting and striving. How does one just "be content" without being seen as lazy or crazy or simply insane? Our society tends to be the "do better" society. Push and work hard and go to school and learn and better yourself continuously so you can .... get more? Make more money? Be happier? What? I haven't quite figured out the correct answer to finish that statement.

Obviously, I am trying to simply "be content." However, I want to "do more." My reasons are different. My heart feels more and I want to do more. BUT - I'm trying to be content. I do believe I am failing miserably.

Hello Basketball!

2011-11-29T14:38:00.000-06:00

Devan has been in the swing of basketball season for a couple of weeks now with the Arrows!! Seems strange seeing my kid in the old purple uniform I used to be so fond of! I am also an "Arrow" from former years and never thought I would see the day - BUT... it has happened. Devan is playing a few tournaments and practicing with a Watertown team. So far, so good. The travel to and from practice is hard, but we have made it work. They are a fun team to watch. This tournament was in Parker, where they played against some amazing 6th grade teams (these kids are 5th graders, so...). The experience was great and who knows what the future will hold for this team.

I did not take many pictures and this one is not even wonderful, but it is the only one I had that actually looked ok. Guess I need some sports shooting lessons OR perhaps not have two little girls with me. I stayed in the very crowded bleachers where we also almost had two broken legs. Dannika was playing in the lowest bleacher under the basket and had her legs hanging over the edge when a player fell against them. I saw her little legs bend and the screaming began. I was so afraid they were broke, but we came out of that incident very lucky. Once I knew the legs were ok, not broken, I had to focus on the crying. If she cries too much and gets upset, the coughing begins, often times followed by puking - that cf snot is thick and just makes her cough. All was well and we calmed down without puke! Yay!! The player who fell against her legs even came up to her at half time to say he was sorry and see if she was ok. What a sweet young fellow. I was very impressed with that young man. Wow!!! She is now totally fine and back to normal. One lesson learned - don't sit on the bottom bleacher with legs dangling over the edge where a player could possibly fall into you. There's one for my data base! I never would have envisioned that accident!

Baby, She's Got It!

2011-11-16T14:50:00.000-06:00

Little Miss Destiny has been showing her true personality lately and really wanted to go to the studio with mom to take some pictures. This is a first for her. She is usually NOT the one to suggest pictures of any kind. Since she offered, I had to jump on that opportunity. We started off with jeans and a t-shirt, but I did bring one cute outfit out with me and she was willing to change. The hair was another issue, as it was back in a pony tail and I convinced her to take it out and promised NOT to comb it at all. So - the hair is the natural, fresh out of a pony tail look, but I still love it! She just eminates beauty - maybe I'm biased cuz' I'm her mom, but.. this girl is pure lovely!

This non-smiling picture was one of my favorites. I just want to snuggle this kiddo!

And here comes the attitude! Can you see it?

Coming home from the babysitter the other day she was thrilled I had made her a sandwich for a snack, until she opened it up and saw roast beef. She told me - quite frankly - "I don't like jerky - and I don't want white cheese. I only like yellow cheese." Well, sorry there kiddo - I told her she could just take off what she didn't like and put it in her bag. I didn't say it mean or anything, but my tone must have been a bit frustrated, because next she says, "Somebody needs a nap in here. I don't need a nap. I think YOU need a nap!" I started laughing so hard and said, "Destiny, you crack me up." She started to argue with me, "No, YOU crack ME up. I don't crack you up." Oh brother. You are just too much for me in all your 3-year oldness!!!

Product Reviews

2011-11-12T17:26:00.000-06:00

Homemade Microwave Popcorn -

Follow the link for detailed directions. Yes, I found it on Pinterest. We tried this "homemade microwave popcorn" this afternoon and it was simply delicious. I am for sure going to be making my own from now on. It is so much healthier for us! I did, however, use real salted butter and a little salt and sugar on top - mixed it all together and the the result was superb!!! I got lunch bags at Target for $1.97 for 100 bags and popcorn was on sale at Hy-Vee for $1.69. Much cheaper than the microwave popcorn bags. I did find that it helped to cut off the top 2" of the brown paper bag. We have a drawer microwave and it is a bit lower than others. If the bag touched the top of the microwave it did start to scorch!

Homemade Dry Laundy Soap -

I have talked about this before on my blog, but had a special request to tell people how we are liking the laundry detergent. My response: We love it! I have since started grating the soap a bit finer - and also discovered you may use a different all natural bar of soap if you prefer. I, personally, like the smell, but, I don't think I would mind something a little more girly smelling. The recipe:

1 cup of grated Fels Naptha bar soap OR any other natural bar soap

1 cup of Borax

1 cup of Washing Soda

Mix well and use sparingly.

I do believe I started out using too much. I now only use 1 tsp at MOST and the whites seem whiter and he stains are good. It is not a miracle, and I still have to use a stain remover of some of the three year old's spaghetti stains, etc. I always did before, too, so I am finding it very similar to the Norwex detergent OR the Shaklee Detergent I used before, but WAY cheaper. We wash a LOT of laundry with 6 active people living in the home, so cheap and great was just what I needed.

Homemade Dishwashing Detergent -

I have been using my homemade dishwashing detergent for about 2 months as well. LOVING it. BUT - I do have some words of wisdom. I was using the amount the directions said AND - using the Lemi Shine. I "oversudsed" my dishwasher and had to call the repairman to come and drain and re-start! I have some fancy high-tech gadgeted Electrolux dishwasher AND I have soft water, so.... my word of advice - use a smaller amount. I am now using only a baby spoon full in the closing compartment and a baby spoon full in the open compartment. So, my guess is 1 tsp in each TOTAL!! The lemi shine - I only use a TINY sprinkle!! I think my dishes are just as clean as before, and again - for LOTS less money. I was using Shaklee Dishwashing powder before - loved that as well, but I LOVE this price LOTS MORE!!!

Dishwasher Detergent ingredients:
1 box Borax
1 box Arm & Hammer Super Washing Soda
24 packages of unsweetened lemonade drink mix, like kool-aid. (**Note: lemonade will stain soap dispenser yellow, another option would be to use citric acid instead of lemonade)
3 cups Epsom Salt
Lemi Shine rinse aid (this recipe does not work very well without it)

Use Lemi Shine as a rinse aid. It works wonders. Just sprinkle about a tablespoon in the bottom of your dishwasher before you start it. This stuff is awesome!!

Homemade Bath Salts -

We made homemade bath salts today for a few gifts - The girls had to try it out in the bathtub as soon as we were done. I tried Juniper Berry and Orange Essential Oils but am thinking I would LOVE to try some Vanilla Spice or something a bit more up my alley for smells. We did a bit of red food coloring in the Juniper Berry ones and orange for the Orange smell. I found the stoppered bottles at World Market for 99 cents each. I am now wishing I would have gotten more! I guess I'll have to go back. Very neat idea for a homemade gift!

Making Life Easier

2011-11-07T13:59:00.000-06:00

Sometimes it is simply HARD to be the mom of a sick child. And, I use sick in a very generalized way here. I do not consider Dannika to be so awfully SICK, but we have to do certain things DAILY to ensure she does become that way. Sick to Dannika may simply mean an every day cold, OR sick for Dannika may mean a hospital visit. Our last Cystic Fibrosis appointment seems to be the BEST she has ever felt up to this point. She seems to have taken a tiny step backwards with all the cold and flu season that seems to be upon us OR fastly approaching. She still looks great. She still has a great appetite, but she is coughing a bit more, and sometimes seems a bit more tired. So, we pull back and re-adjust and try to heal. Healing also means more than the simple healing. As any caregiver of a sick child may know, or any family with a sick child, it effects us all. I find myself stressed a little more when Dannika is not at her best. I know, I WORRY! Why? The Lord has it all under control. I can only do what I do and leave the rest to him, but that does not mean that I live my life always "happy-go-lucky" and whatever will be will be. I believe that there are some choices we do make that effect us and others around us in a profound way. I have come up with a few "LIFE-SAVERS" in my CF world. Some are no brainers for anyone dealing with this disease, but they still have made our lives easier - and better.

1. THE VEST!

This little invention is truly a life saver! Granted, it has added an extra hour to our daily routine and some days I don't feel like I can squeeze an extra hour out, but we do. We make the time to do this treatment. Really, it just shakes Dannika, A LOT! I don't have to beat on her chest or back and try to loosen up mucus, this little machine does it for me.

I can't believe we have logged 160 hours already. That's 160 days that we have been actively fighting Cystic Fibrosis. 160 days closer to a cure. 160 days we have prayed for this disease specifically. 160 days where this disease has crossed my mind, some days too numerous to count. It has also been 160 days we have turned to GOD, our almight healer. 160 days that He has not been forgotten in our busy lives. For that, I am thankful.

The vest time is getting easier as the days go on. Dannika seems well adjusted to the whole process and doesn't fight it anymore. She knows it is something we have to do. She accepts and moves on!

2. NEBULIZERS

Honestly, I did not even know what a nebulizer was before CF. My immediate family had NEVER done a treatment, never had breathing issues, NEVER.... Now, this little machine is another life saver.

3. ALBUTEROL

The first thing Dannika inhales is the Albuterol. She does this while doing the vest, and it usually last about 10-13 minutes. She seems to forget to breathe through her mouth and I can hear the difference in the sounds when I am working in the kitchen. "Breathe, Dannika." A VERY familiar phrase in our house now! She does this morning and night and if she has a cold coming on or seems to be coughing more and a bit uncontrolable I will have her do an extra dose in the afternoon or in the middle of the night, if need be. Right now, we are only doing two doses a day!

4. PULMOZYME

This next nebulized drug is one that I am so amazed by. Pulmozyme. This thins the mucus and makes it not so thick and gunky! Sounds gross, but when she finishes this nebulizer, the coughing is at a minimum and sometimes totally gone! LOVE this drug and am so thankful they ever took the time to figure this one out. Perhaps they just stumbled upon it, but it's a good one for Dannika. This is not a cheap one, but it seems worth the price. I wish they had sales on this one - or rebates! Dannika only does this one in the morning and it usually lasts 10-13 minutes as well.

6. VITAMINS

We have Dannika taking these morning and night. The Pneumotrophin is a lung healer, made from Bovine lung. It is supposed to help heal any damaged areas of the lung. The Allerplex is for allergies and a boosted immune system, which I know she could use! These are the two vitamins we got from Dr. Dobson, who does vitamin testing. I have blogged about him before. He is located in DeSmet, SD and is quite amazing. It seems odd to the typical medical field and is a more natural approach, but I am needing all the approaches we can get, so for now I am sticking with these!

7. Allergy Medicine

Dannika takes one of these a day. We are not fussy on brand - we do generic and Claritan and Zyrtec. I have not noticed a dramatic change from one verses another brand. I don't even really know how much they are helping, but we keep taking them.

8. DAILY MULTI-VITAMIN

These gummy vitamins are sure great tasting. Destiny is always jealous because Dannika gets two of them every night and she only gets to take one.

9. NETFLIX

This one is for sure Dannika's favorite thing. We have enjoyed this little feature on the tv, ipad and even the iphone. It makes the time pass so quickly. I can't wait until she can read on her own. She is almost there, but I think reading would be a much better option than movies, but... when the treatment just plain stinks and is boring, we search for new things to occupy the time. I love to sit with her and read to her and Destiny, but some days, I don't have the time. Then, Netflix is a hit!

10. BOTTLE STERILIZER and GERM GUARDIAN

Many thanks to another CF Mom who tipped me on these two items to get for camping. I use them in my house every day. It saves me from boiling the water and forgetting the nebulizers in there. After Dannika finishes with both neb treatments, I rinse out the neb kits in soapy water and rinse and place in the bottle sterilizer. It gets HOT~ Sometimes I remember right away to transfer them to the Germ Guardian and sometimes it gets done later in the day. Either way, these things are time savers for me. LOVE THEM BOTH!

11. DE-HUMIDIFIER

I don't know how important this one is and I am thinking we should probably move the de-humidifier to the lower level, where the humidity may be higher, but for now it is upstairs and runs quite a bit. I don't know if it is helping her or not, but when she's good, we just go with status quo!

12. JOIE OMELET POT - click here for link to get your own!

This little thing is amazing and cooks an omelet in about 1.5 minutes in the microwave. It saves me from trying to flip the thing on the stove and the kids fighting over the best flipped omelet. They usually break apart and it looks more like scrambled eggs. I guess the omelet pot maybe should be called cool scrambled egg pot, becauase that is sort of what they look like when done. My kids love them and it is a fast and easy breakfast when trying to get them all out the door for school.

13. MOM'S TEA

This one is a total luxury for me, but becoming a staple in my home. I need my morning tea. I guess it makes up for the coffee I don't drink. Either way, I NEED it or I seem to be a little bit crabby!

Halloween Recap

2011-11-07T07:21:00.000-06:00

Halloween has come and gone - and I do believe we have enough candy to last until next year. The day before Halloween we finally carved out pumpkins. Destiny wanted nothing to do with it. She had already carved some at daycare, so I guess that was enough for her. Dannika dug right in this year and even got all messy. Dyllan did one, but he as later than he rest and I did not even get a picture! Bad mom!! Devan was gone at a friends house when we carved them and when he got home he did not want to do it. I guess there's always next year. We seemed to have so much going on the week before that we had hardly any time to do it all together. I hate that!

Dannika's smile says it all.

Then came Halloween. Dyllan wanted to go out hunting - so I guess his costume is of a hunter. He did not actually go out trick-or-treating this year, but helped hand out our treats... which were truly something!!! This year I bought Bath and Body Halloween hand sanitizers - 100 little bottles and the reactions I got from trick-or-treaters where either pure joy or disgust! One little boy even put it back in the bown and said, "No. I don't want THAT!" Just makes me giggle. I thought it was a great idea - so there! Also, makes me sad that my oldest is too old to go out to get treats. Also makes me happy - cuz all that sugar will rot his brain cells!!

Dannika was Jasmine this year. I sort of picked their costumes for them, but the girls were both excited for who they got to be. AND - they wore them well!

My little candy corn! She was the cutest candy corn I ever did see!! By the time trick or treating came to be, she was really sick of the costume, but I concinced her she had to wear it to get candy!

And Devan, my mystery child, wore too many costumes and was far too fast for me to even catch a picture of. He was out with friends and had a blast! I just couldn't keep up with HIM!! That's one real fun part of living in a small town. They can walk the whole town and at the age of 11, it is fairly safe. Thanks to all those in Bryant who gave out treats - we did run into one house that was "not prepared." Ooops - Dannika did not seem to mind. She ened up going around with me after her dance class. So, she was behind a little bit and had lots of making up to do. A few houses really went ALL OUT on the decorating AND treat giving. Treat bags and juice boxes and fun stuff! Made me want to get out there and trick or treat again. I'm sure nobody turned down those treats - unlike my trick hand sanitizer!!!

Dyllan Turns 14

2011-11-04T10:00:00.000-05:00

Someone very special had a birthday yesterday. The "first born." Shaine and I are both first borns and sometimes it is just a hard road to travel down. This 14 year old has blessed us with so much. I am so proud and honored to be his mom! Dyllan's birthday brought a couple bithday phone calls bright and early.

I was not the most surprising and organized mom for this birthday. We did actually pick out a cake a few days ago. I bought this one and the decorator at Wal-Mart pretty much stunk at cake writing. I could have done better myself, but... as she handed me the cake and said, "I'm sorry. I'm not very good at this yet. This is only the second cake I've written on, but I am getting better," my heart drops and I want to throw it in her face, but what comes out of my mouth surprised even me! "Oh, it will be fine," I say. AND - in the grand scheme of things it will certainly make a memory! Notice the big smudge by the Happy? Well, Destiny happened to slip while climbing on the counter and stuck a foot in it! Yes, our house is often times a bit crazy!

I can't believe how this tiny little baby has grown into this amazing young man right before my eyes. His great common sense and clear vision of right and wrong and sincere honesty are admirable. He sometimes seems wise beyond his years. He has a way of putting things in perspective that makes me smile and laugh! Love this 14 year old!!

Someone has turned into a hunting phenatic right before my eyes. I don't see the extreme fascination in it, but he DOES! He braves the cold and early mornings and mud and weeds and mosquitoes to hunt most anything he can. We cooked his first goose the other night and I LOVED it. If you are looking for a good goose/duck recipe I have found one that we LOVE. So, now he excited to try out his new decoy and shoot some more for us to eat!

The other hunting things he got were a mystery to me and brought big smiles to his face. Duck decoys and a decoy bag and a release for his bow. OK! I at least have something that I know he will enjoy now! Last night, after the family dinner while all the other kids were tucked snug in their beds and he and I were enjoying The Mentalist, he says, "This was a pretty good birthday." Whew - I feel like I sort of failed at this birthday. I just didn't have any big surprised for him, not anything super special in the mom category, but that was OK. I did make a pan of bars for his science class to enjoy that morning. Maybe that counts for a special birthday. Every day - you are special to me Dyllan. Happy 14th Birthday!!

Flashback Christmas Cards

2011-11-02T21:48:00.000-05:00

As I am trying to design this years Christmas cards I had to take a look back to see what the old ones looked like. Amazing how much we have "aged." I would say how much we have "grown" but that sounds bad for us adults trying to stay thin and young looking!

2010

2009

2008

I just finished the 2011 card, but you may have to wait to see it! I don't know if it my favorite of all the past designs, but I went with a shaped card this year - more picture, less words. I guess one could say I am going for the simple look. AND - thinking about writing a Christmas letter this year. I have skipped out on that part for the last five years or so. I know I LOVE getting the letter from families to catch up on the past year, but part of me also thinks it will be over-kill. You can read my blog and know my whole life story - who wants to read about it all over again? This jury is still out on the letter. Does your family send a letter? Do you love getting the letters or is the picture just as good? I did not order as many cards this year - so far... so if you want to be on my list FOR sure, leave a comment!

Party Time

2011-11-02T11:49:00.000-05:00

Blog life has been a little slow for me lately. I took some funny pictures with my phone and thought I had to share. Destiny got to have a Halloween Party at daycare and was so excited to be candy corn. That lasted a little bit and by the time it came to actually Trick OR Treating in the evening she did NOT want to be candy corn any more! I convinced her that if she did not dress up she could not get any candy. That worked and she was the cutest darn candy corn you ever saw!

Dannika got to have a school party for the last hour or so of school and I was lucky enough to get to go. She looked so adorable with her friends. Dannika is Jasmine and she is standing by her very best friend in school - they are so funny together. These two seem to be like two peas in a pod. It is sometimes a great thing that they get to have different classmates every year and the next year it could be a horrible thing if they don't get to be with their very best friends. Oh well - it will all be the way it is supposed to be.

This was a mummy game they got to play and this group of girls worked so well together. She has such a wonderful class. I was so impressed with how calm and respectful they all were - even during a party.

I was also so impressed with Dannika's teacher and how she made the people passing out treats wash their hands before they did it. I found myself cringing a bit at all the germ activity - but... we do what we can do and forget the rest I guess.

Dannika Update: She has continued to do well, but seems to be fighting off a cold right now OR her bacteria load is increasing. This morning her teacher told me she was coughing a lot yesterday. UGH! I know that will happen. I just don't know what to expect yet. I don't know if she can fight it off herself, which I pray she can, or if we will end up on an antibiotic again. She did sleep all night last night and only coughed this morning. SO - praying for continued improvement on the CF front!

This one just cracks me up! As we are leaving the store Devan has rushed up ahead of us and placed himself in the ice freezer. He seems to think it would be a great spot to stay awhile, until his fingers fall off! Funny boy.

the HELP!!

2011-10-22T09:48:00.000-05:00

Synopsis: A 1960s-era Mississippi debutante sends her community into an uproar by conducting a series of probing interviews with the black servants behind some of her community's most prominent families. Skeeter (Emma Stone) has just graduated from college, and she's eager to launch her career as a writer. In a moment of inspiration, Skeeter decides to focus her attention on the black female servants who work in her community. Her first subject is Aibileen (Viola Davis), the devoted housekeeper who has been employed by Skeeter's best friend's family for years. By speaking with Aibileen, Skeeter becomes an object of scorn to the wealthy locals, who view her actions as directly challenging to the established social order. Before long, even more servants are coming forward to tell their stories, and Skeeter discovers that friendship can blossom under the most unlikely of circumstances. Bryce Dallas Howard co-stars in a touching tale of race relations based on author Kathryn Stockett's best-selling novel of the same name. …

I borrowed this book and read it in a weekend. I wanted to be sure to read the book before I saw the movie. I got to see the movie last weekend and was pleasantly surprised. I LOVED the movie, BUT... I must admit I was extremely shocked to see what went on STILL in the 60's. I've taught these racial themes to English classes, and I don't know why, but seeing the movie and knowing that my daughter is African American - just hit home. I want to protect her from all that gunk that is out there. I don't ever want her to have to endure pain, and I don't want her to be subjected to a movie or book of such nature, but I know - that is not realistic. I just pray that when those issues come up and she asks questions God will give the the correct answers. It is part of our history, but not part I ever want repeated, with any race or people.
The shocking part that really hit home for me was only when I watched the movie did I think, I can really see how this could happen. It is still happening today with different "groups" of people. It may be the stuck up verses the geeks or whatever you want to correctly call people. Too bad we can't live in a perfect world. I CAN, however, try to teach my children to be fair and equal and loving to all, no matter what. And, if you have not had the chance to see the movie - DO! LOVED IT!!!

I did have a comment once on my blog or facebook when talking about possibly reading the book that they could not handle the language in the book. I do understand. They DO use swear words in the book, BUT, if you finish reading it - just stick it out, you do come to realize that the "Lord" words or "Jesus" words they say are not meant as swear words in any way. The characters are deeply believing people and God-fearing people. Sometimes culture has words that are offensive to one group of people and a simple "word" in another. Try to understand and put yourself in that time-frame. It reminds me of a certain German word that while in Germany was very common, but translate it, and say it in America, I would have been IN TROUBLE!!! Just a cultural difference.

Our Julia

2011-10-16T08:38:00.000-05:00

My blogging has been a bit slow this past week because we were blessed with a visit from our Julia. She came and lived with us as an exchange student from Germany eight years ago. Wow - how time flies! We have seen each other in between those eight years, but we were all really missing her.

On her second day here, we got to do a little photo shoot. Super fun, minus a few mishaps that day. I don't know what was up with me, BUT - first, I threw my iphone in the sink, yes, full of water. Quickly grabbed it out and dried it off the best I could. It still worked, but slowly started to "not respond." There was no sound and it thought it had headphones in. So - the good old rice trick did the job. I let it sit in rice for about five hours and it was back to normal. Whew! THEN - while taking pictures Destiny managed to lock the car doors and shut the door with the keys inside. That took us a bit longer. Finally had to get our handy town break in man to do the job. Thank goodness he was in town. We did manage to get some beautiful pictures of Julia though.

This picture just rocks. The big glasses are coming back in - I always look to Julia for fashion, because they are about two years ahead of us on that front. Well, two years ahead of South Dakota that is! I suppose I'll have to get new glasses soon.

And the scarves are still IN. I guess I need more scarves! We simply LOVED our week with Julia and I always wish it were a little bit longer. We miss her already, but I know how hard it is to even get away for a week and leave your life and job behind. We are so thankful for the time together and can't wait to visit Germany in the future. We are planning on ALL going as soon as a certain someone has a wedding to celebrate. :-)

Homemade Pizza Bread

2011-10-14T11:07:00.000-05:00

Thanks to a facebook friend I have found a wonderful new recipe for Pizza Bread! http://chickensintheroad.com/ You MUST check out this site if you are at all wanting to do some bread baking of any kind.

They tasted delicious. The dough was so easy to make and I am in LOVE with these things. The kids enjoyed them, but Dyllan thought they were not spicy enough. I did not load up on the spices, but skimped, thinking the kids would not like it. Fooled me. I added Ricotta Cheese, Pepperoni, Sausage, and shredded Mozzerella cheese. We dipped them in pizza sauce when eating. Happy recipe hunting from this fun site! What's cooking at your house?

Abby

2011-10-07T10:08:00.000-05:00

I was so lucky to get to do this photo shoot for a classmate of mine. LOVE how these turned out. The day was perfect - minus a little wind, but that is South Dakota for you. As I look at these I think, now if I could only get shots this great of my own kids. That seems to be a bit more difficult. Thanks to Shoppe on the Corner in Watertown for these great backgrounds!

OK - these coming up are true FAVORITES!!!! How cute is this?

I decided to put all three together quick for a little glimpse of her shoot. I am thinking an album would be so great with all of these!!

AND - we moved up the road a bit for a brick background. OH those blue, blue eyes are killers!

I just loved this picture for the great windows in there. Love the girl, too, but for a full shot, this was my favorite!

Such a fun day to take pictures! Thanks for making my day and I hope the pictures make yours, too!

Good News for Cystic Fibrosis Patient!

2011-10-05T21:43:00.000-05:00

Today was Dannika's check up in Sioux Falls at the Cystic Fibrosis Center and we have great news to share. Her FEV1 numbers have increased to "normal." Today she was at 88% - which is pure JOY!! When we started she was at a 54%. The Doctor was thrilled to say the least. He kept trying to get a happy reaction from Miss Dannika and she was like - "whatever."
When we got to the car she says - I think that oil is really working. We went to a massage therapist on Monday who suggested RC Oil. We bought some and have been using it once a day on the bottoms of her feet and front and back of her chest. It is really a mixture of things, but I can really smell the eucalyptus and pine the most in there.
I laughed. I am sure it is not our 2 days of oil that has improved her breathing that much, but a mixture of the correct meds and caution and GOD! I am so full of praise I could burst!
My reaction in the clinic was cautionary. They told us the results - but I expected them to be a little better. She has been feeling great, eating well, looking so healthy, coughing less during the day and night, and I expected an increase. I prayed for better numbers. So, I was not floored by the results - just thankful. When I left the office, I could have screamed, but did not. I just hugged that little punkin' great big and told her that all those prayers are working. She smiles the sweet smile and says, "I know." Then, she proceeds to tell me the oil is really working. OK - that, too - baby girl.

I took Destiny with me today for the appointment because I knew I would not be back in time to pick her up from daycare. Let's just say, my style of parenting leads to very smart children, but a very tired mama! I listen to Destiny talk and ask questions and demand and converse in all of her 3 1/2 years of grown uppedness, and I just smile. I also have a really hard time keeping up with that bundle of energy, but we did it. I don't know how to do it any differently. All of my children have been the same in that sense, so it leads me to believe it is my parenting - I always thought I wanted the quiet and laid back and peaceful child, but nope - not gonna happen. Oh well, it is just always interesting with my children. The nurse is asking all the preliminary questions in the room and Destiny proclaims that her baby, which I allowed her to bring in thinking it would help occupy her time, has pooped and is DIRTY. She must undress the baby and throw the clothes in the washer, which she has deemed to be be the corner of the little room. So - there they fly. The nurse is a little shocked, but laughing. What can I say to that! Yes, little girl, we had better wash those clothes right up!!

After our Sam's Club stop and Justice to buy new jeans for Dannika, I was needing an IV of caffeine. Holy Moly that wore me out! So, tonight I have no great pictures to post but just good news. Thanks to all who have prayed for Dannika. God hears those prayers and she is living proof! They did take another culture, which we will wait to see if she grows any new bacteria, which I hope NOT!

Senior Shoot!

2011-10-04T13:12:00.000-05:00

A few of my favorites from a session I did last week. We were blessed with such a beautiful day! I hope this weather holds out for a little bit longer.

I LOVE this bright yellow barrel behind her. It just makes this picture pop!

And the close up is a cute one.

Love the gorgeous colors here. It is really hard to pick my absolute favorite.

AND the red leaves are amazing.

This one is just such a great exression. Thanks Josie for such a fun shoot. I can't believe you are already a SENIOR. Seems impossible, but time sure does fly by.

Football Season - Dyllan

2011-09-30T14:58:00.000-05:00

Looking at these pictures makes me realize I really have only a few short years left to capture Dyllan's Hamlin Football Career! Four more years and he will be off to college. That's just plain crazy! I can't believe how fast the time goes. This year's football season has been going by so fast and the weather has been simply amazing! Great for spectators and probably too warm for the players. I usually try to have one game of picture taking! It is hard when I still have two girls to watch, but they are growing up so fast as well. They went and played on the playground while I snapped a few of this game!

Dyllan is in the forefront there, ready to pounce or attack or whatever they call it in football lingo!

Love this action shot! That is NOT Dyllan carrying the ball, but had to share a few of my game shots.

Dyllan is the one in the middle with his hand on the ball.

Love this one, too! I sure don't like washing that sweaty football gear. I never thought of the horrible sports smell that goes along with this mothering a teenager deal. Wow!

Had to include the touchdown shot!

I think this is the one where Dyllan had the tackle, but hard to see - I need to work on my sports shots.

Thanks to some great coaches and refs and all the time they put in to make it possible for these kids to even play 8th grade football. It has been a great year thus far and fun to watch.

New York City

2011-09-27T14:01:00.000-05:00

Some people LOVE New York City. I don't think I am really one of those people. It is so fast paced, expensive and busy! We just returned from a four day trip in New York City. I was not feeling the best, which could be a reason for my somewhat negative attitude towards this place! Below is my favorite picture - taken with the phone camera. Just thought it was cool!

I do LOVE the skyline of the big apple. I think the architechture is amazing and I would LOVE to be a photographer in this city, if I didn't have to live there. There is a great picture spot on every corner. We arrived on Wednesday afternoon and took the ferry boat out to Ellis Island where we got to have supper. These landscape pictures were taken from the boat.

AND - this is what we got to eat in. The atmosphere was serene. We had foods from the different countries, similar to dishes the immigrants would have had.

The next day Shaine attended a meeting while I slept in. I was feeling so sick from a terrible cold I just stayed in bed all morning. I think I could have slept all day, but I did manage to venture out to Time Square for the afternoon. Little did we know this would be our only great weather day for our trip. We didn't have much time as we had another supper function to attend.

Love the street vendors although I did not eat anything from them. I guess I was a little leery of that food. I am sure it was fine. I did get to eat a great bagel breakfast from a wonderful little deli.

We visited the Hard Rock Cafe, my favorite place to get my souveneer pin. I get one from every town that has Hard Rock Cafe, if possible. I always try to purchase one with the year on it. I am getting to have quite the collection. I'm not really sure what to do with them, so they just hang in my closet - maybe some day I'll sell them all!

Supper was at the Metropolitan Museum. I was thinking - supper in a museum, really? I was so surprised. This was amazing - just wait until you see the next picture.

This is what we saw as we entered the room for supper. A real temple built by Ceaser Augustus - smaller than others, but the story behind it was so interesting. VERY Amazing!

AND - the next day, Friday, was our free day to tour the city and guess what happened? It poured. Not just a sprinkle of rain here people, but down pours - they got 2 1/2" that day. Lovely. New York City has lots of areas to walk in. We could have taken the subway, but really there is so much to see along every street. We were tough and used our umbrellas and were quite drenched. We found Serendipity's - the famous Frozen Hot Chocolate place that I fell in love with in Las Vegas. The owner was there selling and signing books, so had to purchase one of those! Let's see if I can make some great desserts now!

We pretty much walked a few miles and shopped in some great stores. I didn't buy much - it all seems a little overwhelming there. I love the great stores, but probably was just feeling too ill to really enjoy it. We did also attend a Broadway Show - Spiderman, that night. Very fun - and lots of flying. No one was injured during the performance -good news!

Our last morning before flying out was a gorgeous day - wishing I could have spent a few more days with this weather. This was taken right in front of our hotel, which was right on Times Square. Great location for any future travels, for sure!

AND - all lined up at the airport, ready for takeoff!
It made a neat view out the window of our plane.

Many thanks to those who helped out with our kiddos while away. Things ran quite smoothly, besides one trip to the ER for Devan, who really got tackled in the football game. All turned out to be fine - a hyper-extended neck and a headache. I guess he still wants to play football - and I cringe. It's always great to be home, back in the swing of things, with hugs and kisses from my babes.

Finally - pictures!

2011-09-20T10:52:00.000-05:00

It has been awhile since I ventured out with my own children for pictures. Lately, I have been wanting that perfect shot of my kiddos. The other morning I stopped with Destiny to try a few at this great location. She was game for a few! I have not made it back with the entire family, but got some other great family shots to share later!

I can't believe how fast she is growing up. She is looking so much older - I guess she is! Her vocabulary is HUGE - she speaks pretty clearly for a 3 1/2 year old.

Love this smiley face! I just wanna smooch it!

We were nearing the end of her patience here. She is big on telling us she is patient at daycare when she waits for her lunch. Too funny. She is sure learning lots and growing up way too fast. That is good, but sad for the Mommy in me all at the same time. I am secrectly longing for the days when my kids are all old enough to do things on their own, but at the same time I am already sad about that day coming. Typical!

This last picture was a request of Destiny - the camera was so darn heavy I had to use two hands to hold it up! We laughed and laughed - making memories, my Destiny and me! (wow - I do look old!)

Tulsi Tea - Worth a Try!

2011-09-19T14:25:00.000-05:00

As I caught a tiny bit of the Dr. Oz show the other day, a health guru was talking about Tulsi tea and saying what a good expectorant it is. My mind automatically goes to my Dannika, with Cystic Fibrosis and an expectorant would be a good thing, right?

I was in the Health Food Store looking for some oil fragrences for my home-made laundry detergent and found good ol' Tulsi Tea sitting on the shelf. So, I purchased two and had Dannika try the Vanilla Creme kind. She actually thinks she may like it. I doctored it up with sugar/splenda and some French Vanilla Creamer and got her to drink maybe 1/2 of a cup. Does it help? I have no idea, but I am going to try giving it to her over a week's period of time to see. Right now she is fighting off a cold - so I don't know if it is a good indication of "working" or not. We'll give it a shot. Why not? As I was looking up the benefits of Tulsi Tea, this is one of the links I was directed to - Live Strong . com Strange - but it has quite a few health benefits. Read it - you may want to buy your own Tulsi Tea.

Sick Kids in School

2011-09-15T11:54:00.000-05:00

When do you, a parent of a healthy child, keep your kids home from school? Do you keep them home for a simple cold? Do you keep them home for a cough? Do you keep them home for a runny nose that they must blow once per hour? do you keep them home for green snot? Yellow snot? Clear snot? Do you keep them home for what "could" be considered allergies? Is it truly allergies or a cold?

When do you, a parent of a CF child, keep your child home from school? Do you keep them home for a simple cold? Do you keep them home for a cough? Do you keep them home for a runny nose they must blow once per hour? Do you keep them home for green snot? Yellow snot? Clear snot? Do you keep them home for a cold at all? Do you keep them home for what "could" be considered allergies? Is it truly allergies or Cystic Fibrosis or increased bacteria loads or just a cold?

I get to have the luxury of deciding for BOTH of these issues. I can't expect every parent to keep their kids home from school for a cold, let's be real. Do I keep mine home when they have colds? No - not "typically." If they have a fever, yes, no question, but for the cough and runny nose, NO. Now, our Dannika, the six year old WITH CF, has a cold. At least, I think it may be a cold. She is coughing more and has a stuffy nose, much more mucus than "normal." (Of course, I don't know if I KNOW what normal is yet. I can safely say more than the past two weeks.) This morning I was questioning whether to send her to school or not. She was coughing more and had a very full nose - but beyond that, she is ok. She "would" sleep in if she could, but the school schedule is not so condusive to that. She was in bed by 8:00 pm last night and asleep shortly thereafter. I know she is getting run down from the school and activity schedule. We have been trying to lay low - as low as possible. Sometimes, it just doesn't work. I am just really pondering when I keep her home and when I send her. I swear over half of the students have colds right now - so.... what does the mother of a CF child do?

School as a whole has been going so very well these past two weeks. This is just a little hiccup and part of the new learning curve that we will deal with. Dannika is doing well academically and health wise she has been great. I know it is just hard to avoid all the bugs out there. Impossible!!! She LOVES school and I know it is so good for her to be learning and social. The boys are doing great with all the academic areas and sports are catching up with us. Dyllan had a headache last night and skipped practice. Devan was simply exhausted and did not go to flag football practice. I am ok with that. We were running ragged and it was wonderful to have an early bedtime for ONCE this week. The problem is, for Dannika, it needs to be every school day. Sometimes that is just hard.
"He Himself is our Peace." -Ephesians 2:14 I'm thinking this should be our bible passage of the day for sure. This too shall pass and I won't worry about it. We have still been keeping up with our verses put up on the cabinet wall. We have quite a collection already and I am trying to think of something creative to do with our bible passages. Nothing wonderful has come to me yet. Pinterest is not helping YET! I'm still looking.

Homemade Dishwashing Detergent

2011-09-14T12:43:00.000-05:00

For all you thrifty people out there - I found this on Pinterest. If you follow my boards it is on the DIY board. Here is the link for the website as well. I take no credit for coming up with this idea myself, and the pictures are not even mine - just wanted to share quickly! I tried it yesterday and really loved it! Hopefully, it will be a wonderful savings for a long time. Easy to make and way cheaper!

The recipe: 1 box of Borax

1 box of Super Wahing Soda

24 packets of lemonaide drink mix (I used Kool-aid packets) It just has to be the unsweetened kind.

3 cups of Epsom Salt

Mix well together.

Then you need to buy the Lemi Shine (picture below). Put one tsp/tbsp? in the bottom of your dishwasher before washing. I just put a little spoonful in there.

Use one Tbsp per load - Be sure to keep in an air-tight container as I have read that it will harden. For now I bought the suggested container as pictured above from Wal-Mart and it has a little pour spout. I did not label it all cool - but taped the recipe to the front! So I will have it handy for future batches!

The lemon KoolAid will stain your detergent spot in your dishwasher if it is white. Mine is grey, so I figure I'm safe. I don't really care, but that has citric acid in it - good for??? I just know it worked great. My plastic was not cloudy. My glasses looked very clear and clean, and I'm sticking with it for now!!! I found all the ingredients at Wal-Mart. The Lemi Rinse was next to the Jet Dry and much cheaper than that stuff!!

Why write?

2011-09-13T11:00:00.000-05:00

I have been wondering lately if the blog is really something people even read anymore. I started blogging as a way to wait for our Destiny. I loved reading other blogs by waiting moms and I really connected with so many. I still follow some and LOVE the posts they do from adoption to cooking.

Sometimes I do wonder though, my whole life is out there for all to hear and read and see. Do I care? Sometimes I do. Often times things are not read entirely. People only skim and miss the point of some of my posts. Sometimes I think it makes people think they know me, when really they do not. Once in awhile I get some really strange comments, but that is par for the course! It reduces the need for "person to person" contact, and that I find sad. What happened to a fun phone call from a friend? Yes, I still get some, but less often, for sure. People don't have to call, they just sit down at the computer and check up on my life, unbeknownst to me. Often times they just look and don't even bother to comment that they were here. Then, they tell me they "read about it" on my blog. Hmmmm - but it took too much of your time to comment? IF I go to read someone else's blog, I try to comment - I think is is just being nice. I love to say hello and let them know I was there. Otherwise, I feel like I am intruding a tiny bit on someone's life. My children don't necessarily like their lives on display. Am I really accomplishing anything by this blog?

I do get to share my photography, but ... personally, not sure I want to do this any more. Maybe I just need a break. Please let me know your thoughts on "blogging" and if you do blog and how you handle it all? Is it worth it for you to "read" my blog any more? Should I continue, go private, or just quit all together? Please share!

Would I? Would I? Would I?

2011-09-11T15:42:00.000-05:00

A few ladies were sitting with me the other day at a picnic table and asking me about Cystic Fibrosis. I explained how both Shaine and I are carriers, thus Dannika was the "lucky" one to get the CF genes from both of us. I said it sure would have been nice to know we were carriers, but it was not something I ever thought about. I did not even know what it was. Why would a seemingly healthy newlywed go in and ask the Dr to perform a genetic test to be sure they were not carrying the gene for Cystic Fibrosis. Nope - wouldn't happen! I seriously wonder what a dr would say to that. Then done asked if I had known if we would have done anything differently. My quick response was, "Yes."

That answer still haunts me. I think about that answer and really don't know how I should have answered. I don't know if given a "do over" of 18 years if we really would have done it differently. What would those options be? Well, a test tube baby - a healthy, non-CF baby, a non-carrier baby. But what would that mean? All the genetic research and advances give us all hope. Hope for cures, hope for extended lives, more time with those we love. Does that also mean snuffing out a life God had intended? IF I had known about this gene, gone forward on the non CF path, would I have the children I have? Maybe not. Dyllan and Devan have both been deemed "carriers" of the CF gene through the genetic blood test we had done. Lucky or not? I don't know. Yes, lucky they do not have the disease, but they now do know what I did not. They will have to make decisions I did not, but they have that choice. I would not trade any of my children for the world. I love each and every one of them for all their unique God-given qualities. There are thousands of parents out there, just like me, with a "sick" child, but would we do anything differently if given the choice? I would not trade any of the time God has blessed me with His sweet babes to love and raise and teach. I am sure parents everywhere feel that even a little time is better than no time at all. Every day is a blessing.

I was just telling my Dannika the other day that I would not trade one single day with her. Smart little cookie she is tells me that I should never take a vacation without her then for that would be trading a day away from her!! Hmmmm - guess so, but I think sometimes we need that break as parents. I only know it makes me appreciate my kids all that much more and love on them all the more when I return. I always miss them like crazy, but a little me time does the family good!

So if I had to answer that question again - if I would do anything differently if I would have known, I still don't know how I would answer that. Would I?? Would I? Would I?

SD State Fair Fun!

2011-09-07T12:12:00.000-05:00

Fun? Fair? Rides? Products? Germs? YES - that sums up the fair for me! I did find some great items to BUY though. I am a shopaholic I guess. I found these great baskets from a African booth. The bottom basket is quite large and I am going to fill it with reading materials - magazines, books, etc. I LOVE it. For now, it is in my room, but we will see where the permanent home will be. The top basket is sort of like a purse, but I am not sure if I will really use it as a purse or just a shopping type basket. The handles are so durable and the family I bought them from was so sweet. They were in love with my Destiny, so that was fun, of course.

Then, we got talked into trying the Balance demonstration. Hmmmm - my balance was pretty good without the bracelet, but I wanted to be cool like everyone else, so I got a pink one. Shaine got a necklace, blue and gold braided, and the girls got pink and white necklaces. The boys got bracelets. So, we should be the balanced family for sure! Does it really work? No idea. I have worn mine for the past few days. I can't really say I notice any difference, but I sure do look "in style."

AND - the Thunderhead shower head is a favorite at our house. We purchased one two years ago at the fair for my shower and all the kids have to use my bathroom, of course. Now, we got another for the downstairs bathroom. If you have not tried these out, you should. The cost is scarey at first, $89, but we don't have the strongest water pressure in our house and this is like a miracle shower! Also adjusts to all levels which is great for our family. For some reason, when our shower was put in, they drilled the hold for the shower head a bit too low. It's "normal" height, but not high enough. This solves our problem for sure.

I also got some very cute items from Pixel Pizzaz booth, from my great pal Holly Bratland out of Willow Lake, but I did not take a picture of those items - I should! Dannika got a tooth fairy pillow, and a pop bottle top necklace with a peace symbol and a princess crown for her wall. Now, we have ideas and visions of new paint colors and decor. Another project, another day, when I have a bit more energy to feel creative! Of course, Pinterest helps, but I really want something special for their rooms - I'm brewing up an idea.

Now, on to the germs - I seriously debated NOT going to the fair at all. Can you imagine how many germs are on those rides? How do you stay clean at the fair? How do I keep a 6 yar old from touching every grimey thing there? Well, I didn't. She touched it all and we sanitized in between rides with the hand sanitizer stuff I brought along. I don't know if it did the trick or not, but we "lived." We "experienced" and they had "fun." (I worried!)

Baby Fever

2011-09-05T22:02:00.000-05:00

This little princess was so much fun to photograph. I really think she is simply ADORABLE!!! I was not quite as prepared as I usually am - so it started off a bit disastrous, seriously! Read below to find out why! I always dream of having that perfect infant shoot, where the baby is sound asleep and we can move them, pose them, and we get the perfect shot. Well, the environment was warm, and she was fed and we tried all the tricks of the trade. She started off sleepy in her cute dress and as we got to the undressing part - she was awake. Guess we should have done it opposite, but I never know.

The sweetest little angel!

This one just makes me smile.

Big sister had some precious pictures. She is the smiley girl - if I wait for just the right moment. What a great big sister.

Love the coloring on this one.

And - mommy and baby picture turned out great. I love the "look" on sweet Ava's face.

Daddy and baby - well, I got a few that will be perfect, I hope!

Ava was about DONE with all this picture taking business. She made us laugh, and that's the way you have to be with wee little ones.

Now - for my slow start - I have somehow misplaced, in other words, LOST my camera bag. My camera was NOT in the bag, but two pocket wizards, a lens (one of my favorites), and a flash and all my extra Flash Cards. Now, I have looked everywhere I can think of. I am notorious for putting it somewhere and taking pictures and then grabbing it when we go, but... I have no clue where it could be. It is really driving me CRAZY. I did not realize it was missing until this wonderful family arrives and I feel as if I have lost my child. I was near tears. I calmed down enough to try a few things and finally thinking of the extra pocket wizard I have on the wedding lights - my extras. Whew! Saved that shoot, but to find the camera bag is still driving me crazy. The last time I seriously remember having it was the last senior shoot I did a few weeks ago. I have had the camera out and taken other pictures, but without the camera bag. SO - I have been praying it will turn up. In the meantime, I am making due with what I have and I really don't want to have to replace those items. I even went driving around today to all the hot spots I usually shoot at thinking perhaps I set it in the grass and left it there. No luck! So, if anyone sees a Tamron Camera Bag, sling style, with a bright orange velcro handle and a bag tag with my name and address on there, please call me! I'm hoping I just put it "somewhere" that I have not yet thought of. Perhaps?

Feeling a little Becky Home-echy!

2011-09-01T15:03:00.000-05:00

Homemade SYRUP - yes, first it was laundry soap and today it was maple syrup. I have way more up my sleeve people - thanks to Pinterest, my new favorite site.

If you have not gotten on board with Pinterest, it is easy to do! Go to http://www.pinterest.com/ and click on the "Request an Invite" tab. In a day or two, you will receive an e-mail and walaaa - follow the links and you are on your way to pinning and getting thousands of ideas from sewing and crafting to homemade laundry soap and maple syrup and recipes to die for! This one was a cinch and I did it over my lunch break.

1 cup water

1 cup sugar

Bring to a boil and remove from heat. Add 1 tsp Maple Extract Flavoring and stir. Put in your own container and refridgerate. Serve warm! I am thinking my kids won't even know the difference. AND I had a fancy bottle from some real Canadian Maple Syrup from my awesome host family up there. I knew I saved that bottle for something special!

Gymnastics Girls

2011-08-31T12:32:00.000-05:00

This summer I put both girls back into gymnastics. I only did the rec classes with both, but I do believe I will continue throughout this school year. The girls both LOVE it!

Dannika is gaining strength back after she had lost so much weight and was so sick, and I really feel the exercise is good for her. I know, there are probably germs up the wazoo there, but I guess or now we are handling those ok. We bring her own water bottle and she gets plenty of water breaks. They do run for a bit to stretch out at the beginning of practice, which she is still huffing and puffing about, but still praying that may improve.

She is getting pretty good at those headstands. She and Devan have competitions in the living room, and guess who always wins?

I was not sure how Destiny would react to the gymnastics thing, but she is getting the hang of it. She still will sometimes cling to my legs before they go in, but usually, if one of the teachers come to take her hand she is off and running. The initial "leave my mom" is still not a comfortable thing for her.

She sure does not seem to be shy though! She had to do a stretch for all the parents and show her ribbon and she was so proud! Great job little Destiny!!

Sometimes Life Sucks!

2011-08-30T10:03:00.000-05:00

Sometimes life sucks! I'm not really referring to my life here, but just life of so many in general. We all go through life on our own little path and how often do we all put on the happy face and smile and act as if everything is OK. I am really trying to look at the bigger picture here. Life is not wonderful all the time for all people. That's it!

We ALL have problems. That is part of life. If everything were all rosy and happy all the time we probably would not appreciate the good times as much. It would be boring. We all seem to thrive on a little bit of drama in our lives. At least, that is how it sure seems. We all dwell on the bad stuff, talk about it, look for answers, try to make it better, and trudge on through life. When I look out and see thousands of people, millions of people, all hurting in different ways, it really makes me stop and "simply think." I need to be more compassionate. I need to think about all these other people and realize they all have "baggage." I need to be a better friend. I need to listen. I need to care more. I need to - have time and energy to do it! ;-) That one is a huge one for me. The routine of school has given me new energy though. I just feel more organized and more in tune to it all.

So how many people turn away from God when things get tough? NOT ME!! Honestly though, I believe quite a few people say the whole, "God would never let these bad things happen." Really? Why not? Sin in prevalent - everywhere, why is sin not the cause of "bad things?" I'm not really looking to get into a religious debate with anyone, but ... just stating what I see in my life, my little corner of the world. I am sure others can explain it much better than I can. All I know is that when things get tough, I turn towards God, not away. AND - it helps me. Try it! What can it hurt? Obviously, the other option, turning away, leads you to what?

So, enough of my philosophical post here. I guess I just CARE. I wear my emotions on my sleeve, and when others hurt I want to try to make it all better. Sometimes, that is not possible. We all need to take responsibility for our own lives, but... still be a friend to so many who are hurting in this world. Simply love one another!

Laundry Soap Trial

2011-08-29T13:42:00.000-05:00

I tried making my own laundry soap, which looks a little like Macaroni and Cheese in the picture, but smells quite refreshing and was very cheap and easy to do. I found a blog with a few great recipes, but I opted for the powder version to try first. The others seemed a tiny bit more complicated with hot water and filling buckets and mixing and shaking and melting.

I found all the ingredients at Wal-Mart, and I only remember the soap was 97 cents. The other things were not spendy either, but I just don't want to dig out the receipt to see what they were. I'm sorry Norwex, but price wise, I think I have you beat!!

2 cups finely grated Fels Naptha Soap (maybe I should have grated a little finer??)

1 cup Borax

1 cup Washing Soda

Mix well and store in an airtight plastic container.

Use 2 tablespoons per load

I loved that it did not make too much, just enough to try a few loads and it was so simple to do. The Borax and Washing Soda will make MANY more and I only used most of one bar of soap. I am washing my first load as I type this, so I will let you all know the results of my trial run.

The Book for ME

2011-08-27T14:13:00.000-05:00

Sometimes I think the Lord puts certain things in your path to teach you a lesson. Mine came to me while reading this book, Sisterchicks in Wooden Shoes by Robin Jones Gunn. It is not an author I know at all. It is not a book I would have typically ever picked out, but it was in the stack at the Bookmobile and had a nice dark blue cover, that drew my eye towards this one. I have read all the other Bookmobile books and this was the last in the pile. Funny how that works. I was saving it, thinking if I didn't get to it I would just return it, no big deal. I got to it. As I came to page 106 here is the part that really hit home for me:

"I realized something important about myself in that moment. I like to be in control. Trying to manage a large family can have that effect on a person.
But that was more of a convenient excuse for my anxious need to have all the details up-front. At the foundation of my need for control was the thought that it was up to me to make things run smoothly or at least to make them go the way I wanted them to go. . ."

The main character in this novel, Summer, has just learned she needs to have a biopsy. She is the mother of six, two adoped girls from Korea, two biological and two foster children. Instead of scheduling the biopsy she takes a week off to let herself be in denial while visiting an old pen pal who lives in Holland.

I hope that did not give too much of the story away. I am not finished yet, but this book surprised me. I am SO much of a control freak at times it kills me. I am trying to get better at it. But, that statement is so true that organizing a large family tends to lead one towards "control freak" nature. Things run more smoothly when things are organized. I tend to be that person who needs to keep it all organized. Sometimes, however, I just have to let it all go - it all gets done without me. I'm trying ---

"I can do all things thorugh Christ, who strengthens me." - Phillipians 4 This verse appears in the book as well. Go figure - it is one of my favorites and one I have to keep at the forefront in my life.

The diagnosis of Cystic Fibrosis tends to lead me towards more organization, more control freak nature, more worry, but, also more faith in the path before me. Things NEED to get done on a daily basis to extend the life of my girl. We are getting more creative in how we accomplish those goals, getting the routine down and trying to make treatment times fun. I recently checked out a slew of audio books and put them all on the Ipad. Now, she can listen to the books while doing her vest. Today we did a fun craft after vest time. It was something to look forward to and the girls loved it. Thanks to Jill Catlett for the great idea!

After Butterfly feet we found the Pixos - I do believe I really hate that craft. Little round sticky balls flying all over. Destiny dumped a few of them into my tea. We had to put Daisy away as I was afraid she was eating them all. Whew! We survived craft day!

A Few of Our Favorite Things

2011-08-26T10:18:00.000-05:00

This is one of MY personal favorites. I LOVE to have my tea in the morning. I go back and forth between the English Breakfast Tea and the Earl Grey. Then, I add the fat free French Vanilla Coffeemate Creamer and my Splenda. I usually have to go for another cup after lunch. As I am driving kids to school this week (maybe this year) I make it in my travel mug and drink it on the way to school. I use the Keurig machine, which we LOVE! I'm thinking I want to splurge for the big fancy machine, but for now, this one sort of works. Sometimes it is not filling up the cup all the way and one blue light is burnt out, but still works when you push it. I called the company as it was still under warranty. That was the strangest call EVER. She took all my information and said thank you. That was it. I sort of asked what that meant, and she said someone would call me. Never did get a call - guess I should call again, but... one of those things on my to do list that I never seem to actually do.

I started choosing one bible verse a day and putting it up in our kitchen where we all see it and can think about it and read it together. This morning I asked the kids if they remembered the verse and I was quite surprised. Together they put it all together and knew it. This verse I had read on facebook from Andrea Young. Thanks for the daily inspiration on that one! Today I heard a verse on the Christian Radio Station, Psalms 25:1. I am thinking I will give the kids a day and they can pick their own verse to share.

Daisy has her own favorite, PAPER!! This dog can just chew it right up. She is doing well in our family. In December she will have been with us one whole year. I still like her! That is quite the accomplishment. The potty training is getting much better. I still leave a leash on her though. Seems to work better and then she doesn't do the whole running away from us thing. She never really did - but I don't want that to start. She is pretty calm and I love how she just lays at my feet while I work on the computer. She is really a great companion. She will sit beside Dannika while she does her vest and nebs and snuggle right in.

This next one is a new found love for Dannika. HAND sanitizers!! I bought a bunch of fun ones from Bath and Body before school started. It is not a store I frequent often. I hate the smelly lotions that smell great for one day and then make me throw up on following days. I'm not a fan. The anti-bacterial soaps and sanitizers, however, are our newfound loves! They have the cutest little cases to put them in and they attach to bookbags or purses or whatever. The sale was 5 for $1 so we got 10 sanitizers and so far she has used one a day. Yikes, at that rate I will be frequenting the store quite often. Maybe they have a Frequent Buyers Club?? I guess I would rather have her use it than not. I am guessing she is sharing it with all her friends, so if your girls come home with the best smelling hands in the world, you will know it was Miss Dannika! I guess we will kill all the nasty germs. I'm good with that!

AND - I have been doing a little reading lately. I went to the Bookmobile - for us people who live in rural areas, it is a marvelous thing. It is like a big bus full of books that travels to our small rural towns and we board the bus to look for books to check out. We keep them for a month at a time, until they roll back into town. They also have a library building which we also go to and check out books. It started before we went on vacation and I wanted to have some books to read for the kids just in case they got bored. I read Karen Kingsbury's book, A Thousand Tomorrows, about a girl with Cystic Fibrosis. Loved the book! Of course, I am the type of person that can't just check out one book at a time, so I got a few others as well. I have now read three books in a couple weeks. For me, that is a miracle. The girls have been in bed by 8:00 pm this week and I have gotten my own reading time. LOVING IT!!! So, does anyone have any great reading suggestions for me? The Blood Orange book was ok. Not a big favorite, but it did keep my attention. I have not read the bottom book there yet. That's next! I also want to read The Help before I see the movie. I just think I will purchase that one via my Kindle. I do love my Kindle as well, but there is still something about the feel of a book that makes me want to devour it. I don't know what it is - all in my head I am sure!

Cheer Camp

2011-08-25T10:31:00.000-05:00

Dannika participated in a Hamlin Cheer Camp last Saturday and LOVED it! It was a two hour camp and Destiny and I stayed and played on the playground while the girls practiced. They all looked so cute out there! Can you find little Miss Dannika? She has the bright neon yellow shorts.

Below are half of the girls as they practiced the yelling back and forth cheers, one of which made this conservative mommy cringe a tiny bit. It went like this:

"Hey Cheerleaders"

"Hey What?"

"Hey Cheerleader"

"Hey What?"

"Shake Your Booty"

"No Way"

you get the rest...

YUP - why should I be concerned? I have the three year old who tells mooning jokes!!

AND - a little bit of tumbling, which is Dannika's favorite part.

Thanks to the Hamlin Cheerleaders for putting on a fun little camp for the girls to participate in. Destiny cannot wait until she can be part of it too! And, in all honesty, I can't wait for that either!!

I think this Mommy is feeling like this is for sure my youngest child and I see the light at the end of the tunnel in terms of having my own life back, a tiny bit anyways. I see knitting and scrapbooking and sewing and reading and all those "ME" things that have long been forgotten. I might be pushing it a tiny bit as Destiny woke up bright eyed this morning and wanted to "snuggle." That is my favorite time to snuggle my little kiddos. We rocked in the rocking chair and I enjoyed every moment!

Fly Like a Butterfly

2011-08-24T11:10:00.000-05:00

Walking out of Zesto, our favorite ice cream spot in the world, we saw this beautiful butterfly on the ground. I had the girls with me and we stopped to admire the brilliant blue wings. I LOVE to make my kids aware of all the beauty that surrounds us. God gives us little miracles every day. In the midst of all the trials and tribulations I worry about, there is still beauty.

I want to take a moment to admire that beauty and thank the Lord for it all! Granted, this beautiful butterfly was very near death. I probably smashed into it while speeding down the highway and it fell off the front grill of my vehicle when we pulled up. I did not bother to tell my girls that. He was simply resting for us to admire.

School began without a hitch. So far so good. Still praying for healthy lungs for my Dannika and smooth years for all three in school, but so far - excellent. Granted, we are only on day two. I am thankful for the routine. I love the schedule to follow. I am truly a spur of the moment kind of gal, but not with four children. That tends to send me in a fast downward spiral into a tail spin and lands me crashed - face down on the pavement. Well, maybe not that bad, but it is just easier when we can be organized and on top of it all. Dyllan came home with the pep band schedule that made my mouth drop. Not quite sure how many of those games an 8th grader has to play at, but at first Dyllan told me all of them and then he changed his story to only once a week, he just casually forgot. I'm thinking the boy wanted to see his mom freak out and get all crazy dramatic, which I did not, so then he changed his tune??? No clue. I'm thinking pep band may be a drop off activity or one the boys enjoy together this year. It might not happen for this mom all the time.

Dannika now seems to have a bit of a cold. Praying she can fight it off on her own. I know it did not come from one day at school, rather from our own household. Dyllan has been fighting a cold for the past week, so it was gonna happen sooner or later. Just makes me worry a bit. Go figure.

I have been driving the kids to school for my total of two days so far, and I must admit, I LOVE it. I love the time it gives me with them to start the day off right and hear what they have to say. I learned way more about their previous day of school in that 15 minute ride this morning than last night. I guess my kids like to talk in the morning. I hope they keep it up. To help in my gas money we have purchased this:

A Toyota Prius - yes, it looks strange in this picture. It may just look strange all around, but I don't care. I am LOVING it. The 45.8 miles per gallon I got yesterday made me smile for sure! It is actually quite a smooth ride and has a considerable amount of room inside. A guy at work told my husband to be careful when he left in his pickup today because there was a go-kart parked beside his truck. Hahhaahahahaha! It is so true. The thing looks funny, I know, especially for the South Dakotan HUGE vehicle kind of people we are. I can handle the guff. I love my new/used car.

School Starts

2011-08-23T10:08:00.000-05:00

Today was the first day of school for my three! I can safely say they were all thrilled to be going back to school. I do believe the summer got a little bit boring for them towards the end, but that is how I always remember feeling at the start of a new school year, too! The only tears that fell were those from Destiny. She was not liking this one little bit. She wanted to go along!

Dyllan will start 8th grade. I really look at him and think that in just five years we will be sending him off to college. Wow! Time flies. Dyllan will have a great year. I just can't wait until he can drive himself to all those practices for sports. The mom taxi will be in full force with this one!

Devan will be in 5th grade. They only have two sections of fifth grade his year, making his class a little larger than it has ever been. They are not at 30 students or anything, but 25?? I'm not even for sure on the exact number. I'm expecting a great year for him as well. He is so adaptable to most situations -hope the rest in his class are too!!

And little Miss Dannika was excited and nervous for her first day of 1st Grade! All day, every day, makes for a tough schedule at first. I'm hoping the germ patrol will be in full force and God will protect this little pumpkin from getting sick. This morning's routine went so smoothly. I hope we can keep it up. I got up at 6:30 and got myself ready. We got Dannika up and vesting and nebulizing by 7:00. I made breakfast of pancakes for Dannika and omelets for the rest. Dannika just doesn't like eggs. Go figure! They were all eating by 7:40 and we had to take school pictures and then we left by 7:55. Not too bad! I pray every morning goes this smoothly.

And not to be left out - my Miss Destiny who went to the babysitter today. She was not too thrilled about that whole idea. She gets to leave early today for gymnastics so it is a short day. First, we drop the kids off at school and then swing by the babysitter's on the way back to Bryant. Next year little peanut you will get to go to pre-school. All too soon for the mommy!

I had to take one picture in front of the school! The boys thought it was a little dumb, but too bad~

Dannika with her teacher, Mrs. Blakeman! I'm sure Dannika will have a wonderful year!

Devan with his teacher, Mrs. Symens. When I left Devan was putting all his stuff in his desk. They were sectioned off into desks of 4-5 together and Devan was with 4 girls. He didn't mind one single bit. That boy just makes me laugh!

And - as we left Destiny was pouting. She did not like leaving her siblings one single bit. I can't wait to pick them up and hear about their first day at school!

Perfect Ringlets

2011-08-22T12:37:00.000-05:00

The perfect head of hair - Miss Destiny is wearing it! LOVE this girls hair down in all its lusciousness! She loves it down as well, but the snarls that ensue make this Mommy cringe and the Destiny "scream!"

We had her hair braided in cornrows for almost three weeks. Taking them out was a chore, but the braids were worth it. We loved not having to mess with it one single bit for a period of time. My absolute favorite style is simply loose and free. She looks so stinkin' adorable AND she loves to have her hair flop! I do still have to comb through it every other day for sure. We wet it down in the tub and put a ton of conditioner in it and comb it through. I am using Blended Beauty Deep Conditioner right now, but that is subject to change. I just use lots of different things. For now, that is working. I also have been using Carol's Daughter Shampoo and to get her perfect ringlets I used Miss Jessie's Quick Curl. I just gooped it on all over - so special twirling needed for her hair. So far - so good. I am trying to get her to sleep in a sleep cap, but they never seem to actually stay in. I'm not sure if it is her taking them off or what! Probably her though. We are going to have it braided again in a few weeks.

Sweet Potato Fave

2011-08-20T09:52:00.000-05:00

I stumbled upon a sweet potato pancake recipe that I LOVE! I know, if you are like me you may be thinking, sweet potatoes? Yuck. I never used to like them either, but lately (before the diet), I have been in love with sweet potato fries and now - I even made this great recipe. I had some sweet potatoes that were on the verge of being way too old. I just stuck them in the oven at 350 degrees for a few hours? I really just left them and forgot them. Maybe it was only an hour, no clue. The peelings just peeled right off and I made puree out of three sweet potatoes. Super easy if you have a bit of free time. Makes me wish I had more of that!

If you love new recipes, this site has some great ones. Browse around and share what you make!

Moon Joke

2011-08-19T13:07:00.000-05:00

You must read this entire post to get to the joke! It's a good one!!

I do believe this is the most beautiful picture of the moon that I, personally, have ever captured. I took it while in the Black Hills, making my husband stop the truck on the side of the road. I had NO tripod, only the roof of the pickup I was leaning over. I had the camera set in Aperture mode and I think the film speed was at 1600. It is a little grainy, but I LOVE it!!! The light clouds floating on the bottom are the best.

Then - my cute little Destiny started telling me a moon joke this week. She is really quite a little comedian and I think she will keep this family in stitches if she ever gets out of the clingy stage. Yes, she is getting better, so we are on the right track, I hope. Destiny says, "Mama, have you ever seen a moon in the morning?" I am thinking she is really asking a question, not knowing it is a joke to come. I tell her well, yes, sometimes we see the moon in the morning sky, but not really. And - her response is:

Can you guess? I can't actually show a picture of the punch line, but you can about imagine, right? I know, I should have never laughed at this joke, but it was just too funny! First of all, how did she learn this joke? Secondly, who else has she said this to? Well, we have Devan, our now 11 year old to thank for teaching her this one. Thanks buddy, now let's work on un-teaching it, please?

Germ Savers!

2011-08-18T12:55:00.000-05:00

GERMS - under control. Honestly, I am not obsessed with germs, but this was such a good follow-up to yesterday's germ blog. I finally caved and bought a baby bottle sterilizer to sterilize Dannika's nebulizer paraphanalia. So far we have two different hookups to do. One for the albuterol and one for the Pulmozyme. I am hoping this will be a great investment. It was not the cheapest thing on earth - a mere $70 but we will certainly use it while camping and maybe even at home. Right now I am boiling them once a day for five mnutes. The next purchase we made was this:

The Germ Guardian!! I found this one "used" for $38 with the shipping. I'm hoping I don't regret the used business. Seems like it might be a little gross, but it saved me $20. That's a big enough deal for me! I am super excited to use this once the nebulizers are sterilized I can store them in here and keep them germ free. Right now we place them on a paper towel on the kitchen counter. Yes, that works fine, but one must realize I have a BUSY and MOVING household. Some days the whole foundation is rising up off the ground, I think!! We have our indoor dog, Daisy, who is doing wonderfully, by the way. We are still loving her!! There are a few stray hairs from her, though not many. The four kids are constantly in the kitchen and I am cooking right by them and waving things around. This will help keep them in a safe place and dry. Thanks to another CF mom who recommended these products to me for camping. I finally broke down and took the plunge. I should have done it a few months ago, but I guess I have to be good and ready! (Or just have time to go and shop online for them!)

Germs - Germs - Germs

2011-08-17T22:21:00.000-05:00

My non-germ fearing girl holds onto every railing and touched every door knob. We're working on that!

Oh, how I hate germs, now more than ever! I have never really "feared" them before Cystic Fibrosis. I had a somewhat normal outlook on them, I think. I figured if my kids were exposed they could fight it off. They could strengthen their own bodies and build up their resistance. I always braced myself at the beginning of any school year because they are just exposed to so many new and different bugs. This year is somehow different! I am dreading the germs, the new bugs and all those little dirty hands in school that will spread just the simple cold all that much faster.

It really came into play yesterday when I wanted to take both of the girls to daycare and Destiny woke up with a little bout of "something" nasty. One bad explosion so to say. It was one of those moments when I just wanted to pretend it didn't happen and take her to daycare, but then I think if someone else was sick and my children were exposed to something that could have been prevented, I would be upset. Of course, a parent would never know if that were the case, so I would never even know what to be upset about, but I don't want to be the cause of someone else getting sick. I kept both girls home. Destiny turned out to be fine the rest of the day, but better safe than sorry. Maybe it was just too many hot dogs for that girl. I also decided I had better just ask there to be sure all the kids are "healthy" before I suject Dannika to any new germs, right before school. The answer I got was, "Yes, they are good except a few runny noses." In my previous, non-CF life, I would have taken that as a good deal - my kids are going to daycare. I may get a day off to be all by myself. In my new life, I take that to mean, no way in God's green earth is Dannika going there. Runny noses means germs. Runny noses could mean a cold. Runny noses leads to far worse things for us.

I have never been a "germaphobe" mom before CF. I am trying not to turn into one now. My children do share food, share drinks, share "stuff" but now that means, they share BUGS! I had a big talk with my six year old today about how mom is a little scared about her going to school. She assures me when someone sneezes she will just turn her head away and if they cough she will turn her head the other way. The demonstration she gave was priceless. I pray it works! I pray I don't turn into the psycho germaphobe mom who wants to keep her child locked in a bubble.

On a lighter note I am adding a few pictures from the Pierre Oahe Dam when we visited in July. The water was just roaring through there. It was an awesome sight. Dannika pouted almost the entire time as it was 105 degrees and no wind and pure humid sticky HOTNESS! We had to walk a ways to get down to the water and I ended up carrying Destiny and my 60 pound Nikon camera. That may be an exaggeration on the camera part, but it was near impossible. Not necessarily one of my brightest ideas, but in the end I think it was still worth it!

Not Fair!

2011-08-15T14:42:00.000-05:00

This past weekend was a busy one for our family. Not that we had that much on the calendar to begin with, but we filled it up fast. Our fun times started on Thursday with Dannika and her cousin Kami FINALLY getting to spend some time together. Kami came Thursday morning and stayed with us until Friday afternoon. They have been begging to get together all summer and it finally worked out with all the schedules! I had to take the boys in for eye exams on Friday and got to drop off Destiny and Dannika at Kami's house while we ran to Watertown. It worked out well. Many thanks to my sister-in-law for watching my two. The real questions began Friday night for me.
Upon arriving home, the boys wanted to go to the Bryant Movie - The Transformers. I knew Dannika would want to go, but I was going to say no, simply because we had not done her vest or nebulizing yet for the evening and I knew she had to be tired. She begged to go along. Shaine agreed to go with the boys and I looked at him and explained my reasoning for her not to go was solely based on Cystic Fibrosis. That just doesn't seem right in my mind to say no because of that, but deep down I knew she would be so tired after the movie that it would be near impossible to fight the good vest fight with her at 11:00 pm. We caved and let her go. Part of me wants all this vest business to just go away! I want to be able to skip it! I want to never do it again when it comes right down to it, BUT... a big BUT here. I know she needs it. I know it is helping her breathe easier. I know we can't ever skip it. I know deep down that I will do anything to prolong her life.
On Saturday afternoon we headed to Sioux Falls to get a little bit of last minute school shopping done. It was a tiresome day. I was crabby, probably from starving on this crazy diet. Seriously, in the afternoons, I really do get cranky. The kids were not perfect angels and I had enough and was ready to leave after two stops. We calmed the storm and continued shopping. Again, getting home late. We still had to do the vest and nebulizing yet again. We even got home earlier than we thought, because in the back of our minds we knew the vest fight was still ahead. It went better than expected Saturday night.
I guess I am feeling like I never know if I should say NO just because of the CF or just deal with it later, so to say. After the movie and the late night vesting, I feel like I should have said no, but it would have been a total NO based on the disease. Struggling with that and how to continue. Sometimes I think, for our own sanity, we may have to just cut late night activities shorter. If she doesn't get enough sleep, her immune system will not be as strong. The chances of her getting sick incresases, and the chance of lung infections increase. I'm just struggling "out loud" to find that perfect balance. In a way I would like to just stay in our little cocoon and try to keep her safe. BUT, another big BUT - not happening!!

Diet - Round 2

2011-08-12T12:30:00.000-05:00

My Breakfast of Champions! I have, once again, started back on the Ideal Protien Diet. I know, many are asking, "Why would you need to diet. You look fine." Yup - I looked fine, but fine just wasn't cutting it for me anymore. When my pants start to feel tight and my backside is looking a little more bootyish - I knew it was time! Now seems to be an ideal time to do it and stick to it. For me, the cutting back on my own just doesn't really work. It does, for awhile. I did this diet one year ago and lost 20 pounds. For me that was awesome. It took about 8 weeks and I was feeling and looking wonderful. Slowly, the sugar addiction I seem to have started creeping its way back into my life. I was ok with that. I LOVE certain things that I just can't give up entirely. Frosting is one of them. Cookies are another. Those are the worst for me, but I tend to do a lot of "cleaning up" after the kids when I am not a committed dieter. They always leave a little something on their plate that seems so bad to just throw it out. So, I would just eat it. NOW - for a few weeks, I am throwing it out!
When I commit to this diet - I do it 100%! NO CHEATING - EVER!!! I just want to lose the weight quickly and be done. CUZ - I really am not a diet fan, not really an exercise fan either. So, pretty much I should be mega-obese. I would rather just eat the dessert than the meal. Tastes better - so why not? When I am full I stop eating, but I just make the wrong choices as to what I want to eat. Well, who says it is wrong? I make the more delicious choice, not the healthy choice.
So, for a few more weeks I will be stuck eating a much higher protien intake - and green veggies. (Not my favorite, but I'm beginning to like them a bit more!) Today is day 9 - I "think" I have lost a total of 5-7 pounds, depending on when I weigh myself. I'm good with that. This time I hope to actually make it to my goal weight and stay there for another year - we'll see if this diet thing has to be a yearly ordeal for me.

Another Great Find

2011-08-11T10:26:00.000-05:00

Another great buy off of a link on facebook. You can view this lady's site at www.babybritchesboutique.com I saw this dress featured and thought it would be SO CUTE if my girls could have matching dresses. Each dress was $36, and I was a little leery. Honestly, it looks super easy to make myself, but again, I would NEVER actually get it done. I took the plunge and hit purchase for two dresses. They arrived yesterday and I am so glad I bought them. They are sewn with the most amazingly neat stitches I have ever seen. WOW!

Sorry this picture did not rotate but wanted to show a close up of the buttons and the inside of the dress. They are fully lined and the fabric feels "oh, so soft." It is just a cotton fabric, but very nice quality for sure. LOVE THEM!!!

Now I am thinking about sewing. Maybe I need to break out the machine and get busy. When the weather gets cooler and the nights get shorter it makes me LOVE indoor time and want to get to work. Today I am doing a bit of sorting and throwing and throwing and sorting. UGH! How do I accumulate so much JUNK? I guess we all do if we don't throw it out at some point. So, today is the day. At least the start of it!

AND - for the big reveal--- new living room furniture! LOVE IT - I think. The old stuff we had in there was purple - yes, a deep purple. The boys in my house loved it because it reclined. I was beginning to despise it and it was falling apart. The backs were ripping out at the seems because they were so heavy and if we moved them we grabbed there instead of underneath. It was time! I believe our old living room furniture was 10-11 years old. How long do you keep your furniture? We even "recycled" the old stuff by using it upstairs in our shed apartment thingy. That will work! Slowly but surely we will have that shed complete.

I really love the chair fabric. No idea how it will hold up with four rambunctious kids and one inside dog. Hmmmm - they tell me it is a great set, but I'm sure they say that about all their furniture. We will give it the true test. Only problem is I now have to repaint my gold living room wall. It just doesn't go with the decor. I am thinking a reddish - maroon color just like my one kitchen wall, but not sure if that is too many accent walls in my house the same color. It would just totally match the inside flower color from the chair and pillows. THEN - I certainly need new curtains. So, I am on the hunt.

These are all pictures from my phone, so the quality stinks, I know. BUT - I was too lazy for the real deal and it works for these non-important pics. I really wanted to go to Minneapolis for the weekend, but my husband tells me he has to work on Saturday. So, I either go by myself, which in all reality might be super nice, OR don't go, or beg some friend to go with me. I guess I can just shop online. I really wanted to go to IKEA and Hannah Anderson - those were the two stops I was dreaming about. The rest was PURE spur of the moment. I will for sure save money if I don't go - so that will be the plan, unless something changes my mind. COULD BE???!!!

Baby Gift Time

2011-08-09T22:36:00.000-05:00

I just had to share the cutest little baby gift I found off of Etsy. I found it HERE!
They have some other very cute things. I LOVED it when it arrived. I was thinking, "I could make that." The problem is I always think that and never actually have the time to do it. This looked easy and fun and the result is - adorable!!! Maybe the next time I have a baby girl gift I will try it on my own, but if you are like me - check out the link to get your own.

Look at that cute ruffle butt! OK - not a ruffle but a flower butt just doesn't quite have the same ring to it. It almost makes me want to have a tiny one to dress again. Note, I did say "ALMOST!" So, not ready to jump on that bandwagon, but the clothes are even cuter now than when Destiny was this size - and that was only 3 years ago. I'll just be content to buy baby gifts and if I have the chance I'll try making my own. (yeah - right)

Teasing

2011-08-08T11:36:00.000-05:00

Dannika asks, "Mom, are kids still gonna tease me on the bus this year?"
I reply, "Why were kids teasing you on the bus?"
"Well, because I was coughing so much."
Stunned I say, "No, I am sure they won't because you are not coughing as much any more."
She innocently responds, "OK."

What - kids are teasing her on the bus because she was coughing? Seriously? Why would that be something to tease about? OK - I do sort of get it. Her coughing was a bit annoying. We didn't know the cause of it. Dyllan thought she was doing it on purpose just to annoy him. I grew used to it. It was just part of our every day life. I could see how it would annoy others, it did us too to some point, but NOW WE KNOW! Our level of understanding and compassion has certainly increased and I would hope others would "understand." Reality seems to tell me, "Maybe NOT!"

I just met with the principal and Dannika's teacher and school nurse for the upcoming school year and I am feeling so LUCKY! Lucky to have such an understanding staff to work with. Lucky I could speak so freely and in a completely safe environment. Lucky they seemed to understand and were so willing to help in any way possible. Whew! That eases my mind a bit and makes me so thankful to be living where we do live. Now for the teasing - let's just HOPE and PRAY that it is not an issue this year.

Dannika has changed a bit in her whole demeanor. I am hoping it is not a long term change, cuz' I sorta loved her just the way she was - all fiesty and firey and ready to stand up for herself and all she believed in. The shyness has begun a bit. I guess that is to be expected when she has had to deal with so much new information in the last two months. We are all still learning what to expect and hope for and dream of and trying to stay positive and focused and not dwelling on all the scarey stuff. We don't tend to be a "sugar-coating" type of family though, not in our immediate family anyway. We really discuss it all as it is with her there. We don't hide any information from her and want to be there to support and love her and the other three kids as well. We do NOT discuss life expectancy at ALL! It is truly NOT something I want to even think about. We live each day to its fullest and try to enjoy every moment. It is what it is and we are approaching it all with a faith in God that truly is a blessing. We could NOT do it on our own. Some days I still feel like a basket-case. Perhaps I always will!

People have been so supportive of us - and for that I THANK you from the bottom of my heart. I always felt compassion for families who had to deal with health issues. I had to deal with it with my mom and that just brought it to the forefront in my life. I try to "be there" for others, and never thought it would be ME who needed to be carried - ??? Life is a great big circle~ So please keep praying for us and the cards I have received from friends brighten up the day so much. Thank you! It seems strange to send a thank you card for a little note in the mail, but I feel like I should do that. You don't know how the little things DO mean so much to us.

First Annual Cystic Fibrosis Tournament Results

2011-08-02T22:13:00.000-05:00

The totals have finally been tabulated and from the FIRST ANNUAL CYSTIC FIBROSIS TOURNAMENT we raised $1280. Wooohooo! We are super excited to be able to raise money for the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation to help find a cure for this disease! We are planning more fundraisers for this year. Perhaps a Poker Run and a Vendor Fair and if anyone else has ideas I am WAY open to that, too. We really would like to kick this Cystic Fibrosis to the curb - making it a thing of the past for so many people. I know it does not affect as MANY people as other diseases, thank the Lord for that, but that also means we have to work that much harder to raise money to find a cure. The more people I meet and the stories I hear and the connections we make - only makes it that much more important in my heart! For this - and all those afffected - I will fight!! I think the annual Walk is in June and I have to see if a date has already been set and we need a team name - Team Dannika just seems to blah - so any suggestions for something catchy would be great!

Bracelet sales are up to $320 to date. Please buy one! You can just email me or pay through paypal on my sidebar of the blog.

Dannika sold bracelets at the tournament for a bit, but she was not feeling well at all, which put a damper on bracelet sales. She was running a fever and I finally had to take her home to sleep. Today we picked up another 10 day prescription for Cipro. She seemed to be a little brighter today and on the mend, but very winded after swimming lessons and gymnastics. She has had her dose of exercise today and we signed her up for more gymnastics for the school year. We will do one night a week, and pray I can cope with that. I know it is great for her to exercise and try to keep those lungs healthy. Just wished we lived closer to Watertown. The 40 minute drive kills me - especially on school nights. I'm going to figure out if we can "vest" in the car though. I guess I should just try it.

I have to say thank you so much to those who helped work at the tournament and to those who donated bars and taco meat/bbq meat and MONEY. I could NOT have done it without you all and it would not have been such a great success. Thanks to those who generously gave and are helping to find a cure - not only for our daughter but for all the others! We can't wait to do it again next year and are planning a U10 Player Pitch and U12 Player Pitch Tournament - even contemplating two days. We may be crazy as we are still sore and tired from this one day tournament, but the results were well worth it! Thanks to all!

Cystic Fibrosis Bracelets For Sale

2011-07-29T11:28:00.001-05:00

Dannika is selling MEDIUM sized bracelets for $5.00 each to raise money for Cystic Fibrosis. They will fit kids great and small adult wrists. We will be doing various fundraisers throughout the year to donate to the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation Walk which is held every year in Sioux Falls, SD in June. We would LOVE to cure this disease! There are new medicines "on the brink" of testing right now. Please help if you can.

You can purchase online through my blog - on the side bar you can "Add to Cart" and then pay via paypal. OR you can simply donate by clicking on the donate button that will take you to paypal. Hope the links work, as that part was all new to me. OR - just send me an email or comment and I can get them to you. Dannika will be selling them at our FIRST ANNUAL CF Baseball Tournament tomorrow, July 30th at the Bryant Field. She is super excited about it. The first game is at 9:00 and it will go until around 5:30-6:00pm. That will be one full day of baseball!!!

FEV1

2011-07-27T10:50:00.000-05:00

I've learned something new about this FEV1 number. First of all, Dannika's was pretty low and it is now improving! Praise God for that!~

I knew every time we had the FEV1 number when we went into the CF Clinic for Dannika's doctor appointments. Every time I asked if that number was better and they had always said it was about the same. I didn't fret about it. When we did the great big lung function test at Avera Hospital before our true CF diagnosis we were told the large bronchial tube was at about 80% and the smaller bronchials at 30%. I didn't worry about the 80%. That seemed in the bottom of the normal range and I thought that was good. The 30% sounded bad to me, but I was praying for improvement there. Little did I know, the numbers were far worse.

Yesterday, Dannika had another check-up at the CF Center in Sioux Falls. We did the breathing test first off - I asked what her number was. It was 74. Then her weight was up another pound, so she is improving. When we got to the office I asked again about the 74 number. The nurse sounded happy that it was up and her weight was up and things were going well. So, what was that FEV1 number before. She was at a 56. 56? Yes, 56. Oh my! I had no idea it was ever that low. Probably a good thing I did not even know. Yikes. I would have been WAY more worried that I even was, if that is even possible or imaginable. I guess I would be a basket case! I already AM a basket case some days.

So, what exactly is the FEV1 number. I did not really know so I looked it up, of course. It stands for the Forced Expiratory Volume in One Second, which is the amount of air that can be forcibly exhaled from the lungs in the first second of forced exhalation. I am learning so much and it is all becoming much clearer. I did just a little more research to see what this number or percentage actually tells us - and the results make sense, but really makes me think I would have been WAY more worried if I would have known. Hopefully, we are over that hurdle and I don't have to see a lower number again. I'm looking upward for sure. Here are the results of my further research:

GOLD Spirometric Criteria for COPD Severity
I. Mild COPD * FEV1 at 80%
At this stage, the patient is probably unaware that lung function is starting to decline

II. Moderate COPD * at 50%-80%
Symptoms during this stage progress, with shortness of breath developing upon exertion.

III. Severe COPD * FEV1 at 30%-50%
Shortness of breath becomes worse at this stage and COPD exacerbations are common.

IV. Very Severe COPD * FEV1 at less than 30%

Quality of life at this stage is gravely impaired. COPD exacerbations can be life threatening.

We kept all Dannika's meds the same and are sticking to status quo with the addition of nasal spray and an over the counter allergy medicine to see if she has some allergies that are causing some drainage, thus causing her to cough some. She still coughs in the morning and was waking up at night a few times coughing. That is the part this mom hates. I cringe when I hear that cough, and I know it is sometimes an ok cough, but... still worries me and always will, I am sure.
We also did a blood draw on Devan to check his genetics. It is something he would have to do in the future anyway, and I just decided since he was with us to do it then - when he was out of school. That was INTERESTING. The boy nearly fainted - sort of did. I can't believe it! He is like his dad, I guess. The nurse smiled and said that is was "genetic." GREAT! We are not doing too well with our genetics right now. I think I would like to trade a few genes. The nurse just finished drawing blood and told us we were free to go. She was almost totally out the door and Devan said, "Whoa - I feel sort of woozy!" The nurse, bless her soul, was back in the room in two seconds and laying him down, getting a cool rag for his head. She talked him through the whole thing while his eyes rolled back and he was clammy and as white as a ghost. Poor thing! I would NOT have even taken him seriously. I don't get that way, so I guess I was not expecting him to either. Now I know!!! Devan will faint!!! Lay that boy down!!

Mt. Rushmore

2011-07-26T18:14:00.000-05:00

A few vacation pictures to share! I love this one - arent their faces just funny?

These next two are just cool! What strong boys I have!!!

And this one has some awesome sun spots, but our smiles are so nice in it!

And my two pumpkins! Love their sweet smiles. The trip was so extremely HOT that we changed our plans a bit to INDOOR things. We did lots of swimming at Evan's Plunge and the Waitiki Water Park and the campground. I was about all swam out, but that doesn't take much for me. Destiny is not much of a swimmer if she gets her face or eyes wet. She really gets pretty MAD, but she's ready to go back again every time. In time I think she will love it too! The camping with Cystic Fibrosis went much better this time than last. It is still a challenge, but one we could accomplish. There were a few tears when she wanted to swim instead of doing her vest, or the nebulizers, but overall she did well.

Happy 11 Year Old Today!

2011-07-25T07:28:00.000-05:00

Today I no longer have a ten year old. I will have to wait four more years to get a ten year old again. I LOVED having a ten year old. Ten is just a great age. They are independent yet loving. Not clingy, but sometimes whiney! It will be hard to change my mindset to eleven! I hope having an eleven is just as great as ten. I guess I have Dyllan to thank for breaking us in to all these new eras. Yikes! Happy Birthday to Devan today. This is my favorite picture of him!

Devan just got home last night from a week at camp, one week of camping in the Black Hills and then a weekend at Mitchell for State VFW Tournament. It seems like he has been gone forever! Playing sports is right up this boys alley. His favorite thing to do ever. So, I guess we could call the state tournament his birthday present, right?

This boy is such a serious competitor that I would for sure want him on my team. It was so fun to watch them all play and they all did a great job. This was the first time competing in this tournament and there were kids from all over Hamlin. This was only the third time these kids had played together.

And they place fourth! Not bad kiddos! Way to go!

We are currently deciding which sports to play for the upcoming school year. Tackle football seems to have won the soccer spot, unless he changes his mind quickly. I still need to sign them up for the last session of swimming lessons here in Bryant and then, unto football, and basketball, and baseball, I guess. I am sort of sad to see him NOT play soccer, so we will see. Dannika is conviced she wants to try soccer this year, so if we are running up there anyway... I'm going to leave it up to him. Sure wish I lived closer to the town all these sports are in. That might help just a bit!

Meant To Be

2011-07-22T11:25:00.000-05:00

Happy Movie-Goers with the cool 3-D Glasses! This was one afternoon event while vacationing in the Black Hills with 107 Degree HUMID weather. The girls and I saw Cars 2. Dannika liked it a whole lot more than Destiny. Destiny and I spent the last 10-15 minutes in the lobby where she played computer with the photo machine that was out of order and she was just not sure if she had Wi-Fi on her "computer." Wow- the technology that these youngsters learn is so beyond what I ever knew at the age of three. The world is changing, that is for sure.

And here is Miss Destiny with her Mommy, getting ready to see Cars 2.

I still have to get the rest of the pictures off of my camera - the suspense is killing me!

As I travel acrss the great state of South Dakota, a sleeping child draped across my lap, my mind wanders and I pray. I think of the countless times I prayed for this sleeping child. It was not easy to bring her into this world. My way would have been a few years ealier, but not His way. My way would have been without pain and tears of trying to conceive, without a partial molar pregnancy, without waiting an entire year to ensure no cancer, without doctors and surgery, but not His way.

Did I do too much to try to have this child He was holding back? Was He protecting us from this disease we both were carriers of? We escaped it with our first two, but I hoped and prayed for this baby girl to dress in pink with bouncing pony tails. Was it an unanswered prayer that I just would not accept? Maybe, but she is my blessing! I wouldn't trade all those years of pain and unanswered prayers for anything. Cystic Fibrosi and all, I think it was meant to be.

How many nights have I prayed to God, thanking Him for all these blessings: for healthy children, which was obviously a prayer in vain. It was not His way and we did not even know it. We did not know the genes we carried. We did not know our children even had a one in four chance of getting cystic fibrosis. We didn't know.

I prayed for one more child. One more that we could adopt. One more that was God's child first. One more to raise and love. I prayed for my Destiny. IF we would have known about Dannika's cystic fibrosis before, my guess is Destiny would not be here. We would have looked at this disease as too big to take on another child. We would have been too overwhelmed with the treatment to accept His call for one more. And He knew this. He knew it all before we did. Thank goodness He knew. I can't imagine our life without our precious Destiny. Were all my prayers unanswered? Were they all in vain? I don't think so. I still thank God every day for my four healthy children, knowing that Dannika has Cystic Fibrosis. He has kept her pretty healthy through it all. It is for sure no extra precautions on my part because I didn't know! He has held her in the palm of His hand, answering my prayers every step of the way. It all turns out the way it was "meant to be": Two boys fighting int he back seat, My Destiny grinning from ear to ear at my with her puffy pony tails bouncing in the truck, and a child still draped across my lap, sleeping soundly through it all, thank goodness.

Black Hills Vacation

2011-07-20T22:33:00.000-05:00

We are enjoying a week in the Black Hills. This camping expedition is going a little bit better than the last one. I guess I can chalk it up to being a little more prepared with Dannika's Cystic Fibrosis. I must admit, I always imagine the vacation a little bit more relaxing than it ever actually is with four children. We seem to try to pack too much into our days and end up with cranky kids who seem to actually enjoy the fighting that drives this mom so crazy!! I will have to wait until we get home to add some pictures, unless I get some free time to myself later.
We went to the Alpine Slides and spent hours in Keystone. That town is just my favorite! My kids LOVE Rattlesnake Jakes. The guy who runs that store is just so cool! My kids seriously spent an hour in there. Saturday we spent a few hours at Evan's Plunge. Sunday was Mount Rushmore. Monday was Rushmore Cave and the Soaring Eagle Zip Line and Putz and Glo Golf. Tuesday was yet another water park - Waitiki. Then we went to a movie, Cars 2-3D, Harry Potter -3D and Transformers -3D. Not all of them, but we split up into groups to see them! Then we drove through Custer State Park and saw deer, antelope, donkeys, and a huge herd of bison! It was pretty cool. Today we saw some more "wild life" in a contained setting at Bear Country and then spent the afternoon at Deadwood. Tonight we are sitting at the pool watching our crazy kids play chicken! Too funny! We are here with another family, which makes it fun for the kids and nice to have someone to camp with.
The weather has not been the best. We had to revise many of our plans because of the heat. Most days were 104 degrees. That is just plain miserable!! Even the water park, which was indoors was so steamy I could hardly stand it!
Dannika has done pretty well. The last two mornings she has woken up early coughing for 45 minutes. Ugh! I don't know if it was the heat, the extreme humidity, too tired, or what? I'm hoping tonight brings a full night of sleep. This morning at 5:00 she woke up coughing and we did a nebulizer of albuterol, which did not really help. At 6:30 she fell back asleep and so did I. That makes for a LONG day! So, until tomorrow... We will head out tomorrow and I do believe I am ready to get back to normal!

Photo Sessions

2011-07-13T13:43:00.000-05:00

YES! I am back in the swing of things and taking a few pictures!~

Changing my pricing and now giving copyrights to pictures taken - crazy, I know. It is something I said I would never do, but... I'm doing it. These are a few of Kaitlyn I took just this morning! Beautiful girl and a beautiful personality to match. I had so much fun getting to know her and her mom! Great people!!!

And the ones below are of sweet little Aiden at three weeks old. I LOVE squishy little newborns - when they just have lots of wrinkles and curl up and sleep a LOT!! Precious! I was scheduled to do maternity pictures with Aiden's mom three weeks ago, BUT I guess we pushed that off a little too long as Aiden decided to come early and she was having HIM instead of taking maternity pictures. So, we got some adorable newborn ones instead!!! Just a couple to share!

So for now I am still taking pictures, but just restructuring a tiny bit. I will have to update the price pages on my website soon, and decide how it will all work. I am excited to not have as much post production work to do AND excited to give people what they want! IF I had pictures taken by someone else, I guess I would want the pictures, too. SO - tadaa, here we go!

Camping Weekend

2011-07-11T08:09:00.000-05:00

Our weekend of camping at Lewis and Clark Campground by Yankton, SD brought a little bit of beach!The weather was super HOT and humid. We just are not used to that yet, I guess. We spent two days at the beach and in the water.

We built sand castles and played in the sand. We got sand EVERYWHERE!

Dannika LOVED the water. She is really quite a fish! She would be at the beach all day if she could. I really think our next vacation should be an ocean one!

Destiny loved the water, too. She just sat on the shore and did her own version of swimming with her hands on the bottom of the lake. The water was full of tiny pieces of wood debris. Really tough to even see on Miss Destiny! The water level is so high this year and the flooding has caused a lot of floating logs and wood in this lake! If the wind was pushing the waves toward shore it was worse.

We had a little bit of fishing and family time together. We did go with my brother and his family and one other family. There were lots of people to accomodate, but it really went quite smoothly. We all ate together and did most activities together. Can you tell from the picture below that it was a little warm? Destiny was done at this point and wanted no part of being with this family! She was doing her own thing~ for sure!

We had a little bit of laughter! Destiny and her daddy were having a huge tickle fest! Destiny has the best ever belly laugh, which just makes us all giggle!

We had a LOT of these bugs! I don't know what they are, but they were everywhere. They just sat on you and your stuff and you actually had to grab them and fling them off of you. Destiny thought they were great. She was not afraid one bit, flinging them everywhere.

We had a little bit of crying and temper tamptrums. When we had to wash and comb through the hair we had a holy FIT! The whole campground could hear Destiny screaming, I am sure. I really don't think it can possible hurt THAT bad, but she does! We ended up doing twists, as she had no patience left for any braids.

We saw a little bit of the dam. The water was really flowing through. Really amazing, actually.

We had a whole LOT of fun! This smile says it all!!

Camping with Cystic Fibrosis turned out to be fine, but started a little rocky. More for ME than Dannika. She did great. We let her sleep in as long as she would and then tried to get her in the vest and doing her nebulizer BEFORE she ever set foot outdoors. Otherwise she saw all the other kids and just wanted to play. That seemed to work well, but one day she was convinced to go outside first, and we made a deal. I gave her one hour and then she would have to come in and do the vest without any complaining AND it worked! She did it!

The afternoon/evening session of the vest seemed to be the worst!~ There was really NO down time with all the other kids - we had a total of 11 and the ages ranged from 13 years down to 10 months. Really, the kids went from one thing to the next and naps did not even exist, except for the baby. That makes it hard when camping with more than one family. Dannika never wanted to stop any activity to go and do the vest and who would? One day I convinced her to take the time before we went out for a late afternoon, early evening swim. The rest were getting ready and packing up and I was hoping it would take them 30 minutes to get ready so we would not miss a thing. I guessed wrong. They were ready to go in 10 minutes and my brother came to see if we were ready. NOPE! He told us we could just go down to the beach when we were done and Dannika looked at him and pleaded, "Can't you just wait 19 minutes?" EXACTLY!!! She said it best, but really it is hard for others to understand and get it. Dannika looks healthy. Dannika seems healthy. Dannika eats well. Dannika does not cough as much any more (for now!). So it is somewhat of an invisible thing - lurking in the wings, waiting to pounce. All these treatments we are doing are working, but we must continue to try to keep her healthy. I don't want to do the hospital visit for 7-14 days. I don't want to fight another bacteria in her lungs. I don't want to fight any more colds. I don't wanna - but I do know it will probably happen in the future. My hopes are not that unrealistic, but I am trying to keep her as healthy as possible. When she sleeps in until 10:00 am, I rejoice. There was really no DOWN time when camping - it was GO, GO, GO. I don't know if her lung function has improved over the last two weeks, but she needs to sleep, more so than other kids. That will help her immune system fight off any bugs - I pray!

Sterilizing nebulizer equipment was a bit of a huge headache for this mom!~ I am now going to be purchasing an Avent Electric Baby Bottle Sterilizer and a Germ Guardian after some helpful advise form a fellow CF Mom! Washing them in soap and water in the camper worked, but the water is not as HOT as it is at home, and then I did boil them in the camper, but the water took forever to heat, and it never did get to a full rolling boil like at home. So, how sterile did I get them? No idea. We just did what we could! We did enjoy our time and will be heading out for a full week in the Black Hills soon. Hoping I can find those sterilizing items before we leave! I am a little more prepared now and am thinking the trip will be great. Wish me luck!!!

Rejoice!

2011-07-06T15:01:00.000-05:00

As I was taking baseball pictures last night, I glanced up in the sky and saw the moon, so beautiful. This pictures is literally straight out of the camera. LOVE it! I wish I could have gotten a bigger lens and gotten a bit more of a close up of the moon, but maybe tonight. I just love the deep blue sky and that tiny little moon.

This afternoon I got a call from our Cystic Fibrosis doctor on my cell phone. It was one of those moments where you look at the number and wonder who in the world that could be. I answered, and he tells me who he is. PANIC bolts through me. He has news. What could it be? Rejoice - the results of Dyllan's genetic test show he has only ONE of the Delta 508 genes, meaning he does NOT have Cystic Fibrosis, but is a carrier of the gene. We are praising God!

I told Dannika the news and she let out a big sigh. I asked what that meant, wondering if she felt happy or sad. She said she was just so happy he doesn't have it. She said it is too bad I do, though. I just wonder what it would feel like to be six and know you have this CF stuff and find out no one else in your family does - good or bad? She never says she wishes it on anyone else. She looks at it with a confidence and determination I knew she had! My little trooper!

I opened up my Bible today and what popped up? You will never guess. Job 34:29-30 "But if He remains silet, who can condemn him? If he hides His face, who can see him? Yet He is over man and nation alike, to keep a godless man from ruling, from laying snares for the people." I read the sidebar little notation and it asks the question: Why is God silent and hidden at times? The silence of God is a difficult thing for a suffering person to endure. Why would God reamin hidden when his comforting presence is needed the most? Perhaps becuase the answer to a perso's suffering is so complex that God does not ask that person to try to understand it; instead, God silently sustains the person through the pain. Or perhaps the answer is so simple that God leads the person to discover the answer for himself or herself by remaining silent.

Hmmmm - makes me think a little. I can't truly say that I feel God is silent through this all- well not today anyways, as I am too elated about Dyllan's news to truly feel down and out. Have I felt that way through this whole journey? Yes, at times. Those are the times I must simply breathe deep and pray and read my Bible even more! I do believe God can heal this disease and my little girl. There are new drugs being developed as I write this! Her lungs may remain healthy - improve! That would be a miracle! BUT, why not believe in miracles? With faith as small as a mustard seed mountains can move! It just seems too big - too imposssible - easier to accept it and move forward! Cystic Fibrosis - the term brings fear to so many people - even to me. It also brings hope to me, hope for a cure, hope for a miracle, hope for a long and prosperous life for my girl!

The cough has returned a tiny bit for Dannika! I cringe when I hear it, but Dannika tells me it is a good cough as she is bringing that gunk out of her chest! True! I just don't know when it is an ok thing and when not. The doctor told me she just may be one that does have a bit of a chronic cough. Really? That stinks! I'm praying NOT! She seems to be a little bit hoarse, but could that be from the pulmozyme? Her nose is also a bit more stuffy? Another cold coming on? I think we've had our share - OK she had one at the start of summer. I just seem to be much more aware of them now.

Oh Beautiful!

2011-07-05T12:20:00.000-05:00

The perfect morning finally arrives. The air is crisp and cool and the girls are in good moods and they get into their fancy dresses and then we are off to the field. The field I have scoped and spotted and dreamed about these perfect dreamy pictures of my two beautiful babies - and, here is what happens...

Destiny is a cranky thing. She wants no part of pictures. She hates her dress because it is too scratchy. She hates the field because the grasses tickle her legs and they are pokey. She is too cold. She is not thrilled in the least bit!

Destiny reverts to sucking her thumb and insists she would rather sit in her car seat than be outside with us!

Dannika is a pro - jumps right in and poses for me! This is not the best posed picture, but the sun was getting too bright and her eyes were all squinty in the others. This smile is true and genuine Dannika. My sweetie!

I try to convince her to try a couple more, but the smile is fake and forced and the eyes are too squinty. I do like this one because her fingers are making the PEACE symbol. I did not even know until today while I was editing!

And - my beautiful vision - not quite like I envisioned, but makes me giggle NOW. These are the memories that I will never let them forget!

Medical Update: Dannika has just finished her 10 days of antibiotics and the coughing was GONE completely during that time. Right now I am in panic mode, praying the cough stays away, terrified it will be back! Still no word on Dyllan's genetics. My patience wears thin and I pray for good news with that test. Part of me wants to know now and part of me wants to wait - until it is for sure the good news I want. Isn't that how it goes? I fear more for Dannika now - when she plays with a group of kids and someone coughs or sneezes. I cringe - on the inside. I want to rush over and pull her away and tell all the kids to leave, but I don't. I pray a silen prayer and grit my teeth and what else can I do?

I fear the beginning of school already. Our routine is working for now - up in the morning when she happens to awake (today it was noon - no kidding!). She does her 30 minutes of vest time while she nebulizes with the albuterol and pulmozyme. Then, in the evening, when we can squeeze it in, we do the 30 minutes of the vest again and the albuterol. There are pills inbetween, but for now, it is working. As I say that, she coughs in the kitchen. I have to go get the treatments started for her day. How will we fit it all in with school? I know it will all just work as it is supposed to, but how? The unknown is somewhat scarey.

Up to Bat

2011-07-01T23:02:00.000-05:00

Finally, got some pictures of my oldest playing baseball, too! I guess he gets his own post! He is having a great season so far - lots of pitching!

I love this pitching shot - if you look closely you can see the ball flying through the air. So cool! I can't even play catch with Dyllan any more. He throws way too hard for this scaredy cat! I tried to hit one of his pitches last year and just screamed - guess not! I would be the player who does not stay in the batter's box!

The team waiting to play!

Yeee-Hah!

2011-06-30T11:56:00.000-05:00

Super excited! It is true - Dannika's pancreas WORKS! So, That means she is DDF508 - meaning she has double Delta F508 genes, one from Shaine and one from me. Notice I put his name first. I was thinking it is really pretty ingenious on God's part to give us identical CF genes, otherwise we would fight. He had to keep it even. We would be teasing each other and saying 'you gave her the worst one.' So, we both lose, or win, or have bad genes, depending upon how you look at it. In all seriousness, it is the most common, BUT it is almost textbook that if a person has these two genes the pancreas does not work. Dannika is beating those odds right now. There is no guarantee that her pancreas will continue to work, but that's what we are praying for. It may stop at any point. We need to be aware of her eating and vitamin levels at all times to be sure.

Cipro is the antibiotic she has for a few more days and her cough is still GONE!!! Praising God here! It is so strange to have her not coughing at all. Seriously, we have listened to that for YEARS, and the silence is music to our souls. She has also been doing pulmozyme as a nebulizer and so far so good. I don't notice HUGE improvement from that necesarrily, but after she did it the first time I asked her if she noticed any difference and she said, "Yes, I can swallow without all that gunk in my throat." Bingo - I think it is doing its' job! We are still vesting away, twice a day for 30 minutes each time, but she has a hard time increasing the pressure - or beats per second - whatever that number is measuring. She will say it hurts her tummy if we try to raise the number. Sometimes she has even done it sleeping - in the mornings when we have to get up early for an appointment or such. Then, I can get away with a higher number and she does not even notice. Too tired to notice!

We are still awaiting the genetic tests on Dyllan and as I sat watching his baseball game last night I still have no idea - He came and talked to me inbetween games and his nose was running, alerting me that maybe it is something??? The unknown is sometimes the worst! Either way, I know it is do-able! A clean bill of health is my prayer.

Dannika and I were talking this morning and I asked her if she prays to be healed. She said, "Yup, every night, after Dad tucks me in. I don't pray that with him, just by myself." Then, I asked if there is anything else she prays for every night. "Great Grandma to be all better and all the sick people in the world like those with cancer and stuff." That girl - makes my heart smile. I was doing the "awww" thing in my head and there on the side of the road were the most beautiful PINK flowers - mind you, it is a gravel road, where it is rare to see PINK! We stopped and picked two and I am thinking it HAD to be a sign. The sign that those prayers ARE heard! I think they were those primrose things and now I have little prickles in my finger, but... so worth it anyway!

Three Strikes - You're Out!

2011-06-28T14:48:00.000-05:00

We have three baseball players this summer - all on different teams! That makes for a little more stress in this mama's life! There have been a few nights where we had games in three different town for three different children AND we made it work. Thanks to some wonderful friends who are willing to carpool a bit with us - and it may never be "even" so to say, but it sure does help us out a TON! Dannika is playing baseball with the Bryant team. She loves it for one game and is ready to be done after that. We practiced a bit as a family this past weekend, and she was smoking that ball, so it may improve her desire to stick it out for two games. We will see.

Normally, when she plays her brothers are playing and she wants to get to their game to watch them as well, usually Devan.

Devan plays for Lake Norden, but also for a "traveling" Hamlin team on 10 and under boys. These pictures were from the Hamlin team. Devan is even a pitcher, once in awhile.

I really don't know how BOTH of our boys ended up being talented in the pitching area. Shaine is not a pitcher, but just loves the game of baseball. Maybe it is all the Sports Center they watch?

Honestly, this kid is so blessed by God for his amazing talent. I have not found a sport yet that he has not excelled at. He loves them all and is so fun to watch. Soon, he may have to start picking and choosing and I am curious to see what he would pick. He pretty much goes non-stop all year round. I really sort of hate people that just are great at everything they do - then I met Shaine, and now my own kid! Devan, is very humble as far as I have seen. Hope he stays that way and we can lead him in that direction.

And - here is Miss Destiny in all her baseball fan glory! She has seen quite a few games already in her three year old life and has every play set pegged by now! She is normally pretty good at the games, but we have yet to see a game of Dyllan's - not the whole double header game! Tomorrow, I am going to try. Have not yet decided if I am going to brave bringing the girls with or try for the babysitter. Dyllan's games get quite long and I need to take some pictures of him playing. Thus, none of him YET! He plays for Arlington/Lake Preston Teeners this year, and is having a fun year. So - you will have to wait to catch his pictures - next time!

New Projects

2011-06-27T16:17:00.000-05:00

I just ordered this awesome sewing book, Growing Up Sew Liberated by Meg McElwee! I am so excited to try sewing some of the great projects in there! I am by no means the master seamstress, but I want to try. The pattern for the doll carrier and the art satchel look too cute! Click on the link and you can get a signed book and a free extra pattern if you are interested. I'll let you know how it goes, if I ever get the time to be creative again. I must have the itch!~

Stop - for these two!

2011-06-26T18:07:00.000-05:00

I convinced the girls to let me take them out one morning for some fun pictures. Dannika was LOVING it and Destiny - well, let's just say we FINALLY bribed her to take these pictures with the promise of picking something out of the treasure box. Glad I finally got a few of the two of them together.

These two are so close - very cool really. I don't have a sister and always thought it would be so fun. Now, I know it would have been great, IF we would have had the bond like these two do! This was a picture from the last ones I took and we were giggling because of the stop sign in the background. I told them people would STOP for these two cuties!

And for the last sweat test Dyllan will ever have to take - I had to get one picture. This was taken during the "sweating" stage. They wrapped him up in warm blankets and the room was so warm we were ALL sweating. It worked though, and he collected enough sweat. When we got to the actual doctor's appointments, we were once again knocked off of our chairs. The sweat test and a chest x-ray were done early in the morning and then we went for lunch and a few stops before going back to meet with the doctor and get the results. We started with a breathing test for both Dannika and Dyllan and then we were anxiously awaiting the genetic tests from Dannika. WELL -

We started with Dannika and learned her genetics came back Doube Delta F508. That is the worst and most common gene for Cystic Fibrosis. That was a bit of a shock once AGAIN, because her symptoms seem less severe than some, but... guess not! The real mystery is that her pancreas is sufficient, meaning it works! Miracle, really, but the dr. is testing the enzyme level one more time to be sure. We were told it is very "textbook" that is someone is the double delta 508, the pancreas is insufficient, but, each case is obviously unique and we don't know why hers seems to be working at this point. Small problem, Dannika had lost 2 pounds and her coughing had certainly increased since the last visit. New meds once again, which, I THINK are working! Dannika now has 10 - 20 days of Cipro and a new nebulized drug - Pulmozyme. The Cipro seems to give her stomach aches, but I really think that is working. She woke up this morning, the first time in a month, with NO coughing! Not even a little bit - NONE!!! Shaine and I both were waiting for the coughing fits and after about 10 minutes we looked at each other and almost cheered! We just started the Pulmozyme yesterday and only do it in the morning, so I really don't think the NO coughing could be contributed to that YET??? It really is all a mystery to me - what I "THINK" in my head always seems to turn out to be the opposite. Now, onto the Dyllan story. . .

We were shopping in Scheels and Dyllan and I were making "deals" that if his test comes back negative we are going to do this and this and this... We were both sort of kidding around - knowing the likelyhood of going from a 70 to a 40 is nearly impossible. BUT, when the dr. told us the new sweat test measured 50, we were thrilled. That means this test was actually a "border line" reading. We have NO idea still if Dyllan actually has CF or is just a carrier. The dr. called for a blood draw to do the genetic testing on Dyllan as well, which means yet another 3 weeks of waiting, but it really is the only sure way to know. His chest x-ray was perfectly clear, no signs of scarring or past infections. Whew! Dyllan had an awful cold when we were there, and his breathing test was not 100%, but rather 80%. We were told 80% could still be considered normal, but at the lower end of normal. Hmmmm - Dannika measures an 80% on her breathing test, but I guess, hers is more alarming?? Probably...

Here is Dyllan getting blood drawn - you would think it was close to the worst thing in the world. I guess he really does NOT like needles. They had a bit of numbing cream that he insisted upon having before he let them draw blood. I was really laughing at him, but getting a little angry at the same time. It was near ridiculous. Oh well - we got it all done and now we just wait once again. The doctor felt so bad for taking us through all these ups and downs - more than typical in the cases he deals with I guess. He did compliment us and say we sure seem to be taking it all well. Hmmm.. what does that mean? I guess he caught us on a good day. I can't speak for Shaine, but I know I am just trying to stay positive. If I dwell on the news too long, I cry. After telling the news to many of my family members I felt like I had been run over - I just felt heavy with fear and dread and had the biggest headache of all. I am so thankful that they care - that they try to make it all better, knowing they can't. It feels wonderful to know they are praying for us - and feel so blessed through it all. There are positives in all of this for sure - Still praying for 1. Dannika's pancreas to truly be sufficient - working normally! 2. Dyllan's genetics to come back with only ONE of the genes, showing he is a carrier, or better yet NONE of the CF genes at all! 3. Me to handle it all with grace and be a positive light, showing God's mercy and grace through all the trials in our lives. 4. Peace - and - acceptance.

Wasting Money

2011-06-24T09:13:00.000-05:00

Have you ever wasted money? YES - We all have. I think my biggest waste of money was taking those insurance tests to be able to sell insurance. I really hated studying all that stuff. I wasn't sure that I even wanted to ever sell insurance, and in the end decided it was a huge waste of time. Granted, I have them done, but they probably expire. Who knows? And, I will never need to know. I don't plan on EVER selling insurance or anything of that sort. I don't think I would like having a job based soley on commission. It would drive me to be a pushy type o person - not for me!

How about wasting money on things to make yourself "look" better? Sure, I buy make-up, color my grey hair, and clothes are my downfall for sure! We do need clothes, right? Granted, I don't need the brand names that I do buy, nor do my kids, but they look so great. See? My downfall for sure. Or a new purse or bag, or shoes, which I am really doing much better at since my foot has been hurting! I only buy shoes that are actaully going to support my foot instead of the crazy fashionable shoes I would love to buy but know I will be hurting afterwards! That must be old age.

How about serious types of surgeries or "enhancements" or "suction" to make you look better? Botox always sounds like a good idea when I look in the mirror and see those wrinkles forming, but in the end my sense of reason takes over and I realize I don't need it. Those wrinkles are well earned and beautiful in their own way! (I am not so sure if I am in 100% agreement with that last statement, but I am trying to be!)

I am trying NOT to ever waste money on those types of things. Why? Look around your world today. What do you see? Are those people really happier than all the rest because they "look" better in their opinion, or the world's opinion? I don't think so. Happiness comes from within. A sense of belonging and being loved and GIVING love and being happy and content with what you have! If you can't give, you can never receive! I also see a world full of pain, and disease, and hunger and orphans. How much better would that money be if it were given for one of those things? I know, easier said than done. I look at my new Coach purse, which I love, by the way, but ... what a waste. I am just as guilty as everyone else. I am so blessed beyond measure and yet, I waste. (I am still coloring my hair by the way! So, I guess I am still wasting!)

Fear Factor!

2011-06-22T22:03:00.000-05:00

Here is a girl after her own dad's heart. The field trip this year for Dannika's Kindergarten class was to the Children's Museum in Brookings. She jumped right in changing tires and putting oil or whatever that bottle is in the "car." See, she will probably know more than I do about cars very quickly! She was not intimidated at all by all the kids playing. She just gets right in there! I can sort of tell she has two older brothers!!

This one below is the best - it is Dannika and Kami, the two tire cousins discussing how it works. I think Dannika was explaining how to change the tire. Maybe she knows more than I thought from hanging out at WW Tire. Guess they are teaching her well!

Feeling a little fearful today!

Yeah - not supposed to feel that way! Well, bah-humbug - I do! I am a little fearful for tomorrow. We have a Cystic Fibrosis appointment for Dannika and Dyllan. Dannika battled a cold in these few weeks and it has taken a toll on the cf progress. She is coughing more, but back on uphill side of things I pray. She was waking up in the night again coughing and we would have to nebulize at about 3:00 am. Now that tires this mom out! The mornings are the worst, but after her nebulizer treatment the coughing subsides. She is still waking up at about 7:00 am now coughing, which is unlike her really, unless she has gone to bed at 8:00 pm and as you know from my previous blog post on bedtime - that is NOT happening here! There is talk of putting her on a new nebulizer medicing - pulmozyme, which has its pros and cons, so we will see. I also still notice when she runs or exercises the coughing increases, but also her breathing. She is really huffing and puffing.

As we do all the treatments for her and start adding things to help her, it also increases the amount of time it all takes. It is all worth it. If it helps her - we'll do it, no matter what, but... I am so fearful of school starting. I have NO idea how I will get it all in. Seriously, I would LOVE to homeschool, but I don't think Dannika would like it one bit. Well, she might, but she would miss the whole social aspect of school. I really don't know if I could handle it every day either. So, probably not a real possibility for me, but... it has me thinking!

Dyllan will also have his second sweat test and a chest x-ray and breathing test. Thinking he will have good results, but this one still mystifies me, so I am not "predicting" anything. He has a bad cold right now that we all battled last week, so I am sure they are going to think that is the CF, but really it is just a cold. They probably think I am crazy anyway, as he is 13 and I haven't seen any symptoms of CF in him.

Just came home from Wednesday night church and am feeling so much better about things. We have not been able to go for the past few weeks because of baseball games and I really enjoyed the extra time with God tonight. It really puts all my worrying in a bit of perspective. Really, this Cystic Fibrosis is hard for a type A personality mom to grasp. So much is truly out of my control. It would have been controllable before we had kids, if we would have known, but we didn't, and we are blessed to have the kids we do! I would not change that - I would take the CF away if I could though!! I pray that I can be a light through all this disease, that God can use this and us to be a benefit for Him and His kingdom. He can and He will and perhaps He already is! I opened up the Bible tonight to the PERFECT verse for me this evening.
Psalms 90:17 "May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us- yes, extablish the work of our hands." The side note really resonated in me.
How does God "establish the work of our hands?" - by teaching us this wisdom: Our lives are brief in the scope of eternity. What we do, though it often appears insignificant, is made significant by God. He takes our efforts and gives us success and hope, infusing even the mundane with lasting value!

Wow - if I just think on that one, I LOVE it! I need to be reminded that He is in control - yes, my personality fights that one tooth and nail, but He is - no matter what! So, as we face what is before us tomorrow, I know the outcome will be all for His good. It may not be what we want to hear, or it may be joyous news with improved breathing results for Dannika and perfect for Dyllan, but either way - it's OK!

Father's Day Fun

2011-06-21T15:02:00.000-05:00

Father's Day is always a fun, but hard day to celebrate. I never know what to get the dear Father! He has or buys whatever he wants, and to surprise him is near impossible. SO - we started our day off by getting ready for church and opening a few small gifts.

Dannika and Destiny made T-Shirts for their DAD at daycare and they were so proud to give them to him. They are super CUTE! Thanks to Shannon for a great gift idea!~

The picture is pretty BAD - and blurry = used Devan's little point and shoot camera just because it was handy and we were running late for church! Devan's gift was the cutest. He asked what he was supposed to give to Shaine? I told him I had no idea - whatever you got him! Well, the night before we had been in Wal-Mart and Devan convinced his dad that he needed this new hat. It is a pretty cool one. Tiger Woods Nike golf hat - so, Devan wrapped it up, all on his own accord, just to give it to his dad. What a sweetie! Then, after church, Devan wanted to know if we could stop at Wal-Mart. Yup, you guessed it. He wanted to get another hat for himself, like the one he just gave away to his dad. Too funny. We did NOT go back to buy another hat. So, now they are going to have to share!

I failed miserably and got the dads NOTHING! Seriously, I had not a CLUE what to get him. I did not even get a gift for my dad yet either. Ideas are still welcome - better late than never right???

Bedtime Blues

2011-06-18T15:54:00.000-05:00

Bedtime at our house just sucks, in my opinion! It is for sure a daddy job! I am the kind of mom who wants the bedtime routine down pat! My ideal dream is supper at 6:00, followed by Dannika's therapy (guess I have to add that now), get jambes on, brush teeth, read stories and all tucked in with all pertinent children staying IN their beds by 8:30. For some reason, it truly is just a dream!!
Realistically, it goes like this: supper done by 7:30. Kids go off to play while mom does dishes (or NOT)and they love to dash off outside and it's a bonus if they can talk their dad into a little baseball practice! By this point in the evening I am sighing a huge sigh of relief that they get some time with their dad and Destiny is not begging to be held or aging at me! (yea, we are STILL dealing with that issue) I finally convince them all to come in at 8:30 and we do Dannika's vest therapy and nebulizer. It is 9:00 and finally time to brush teeth and I beg Shaine to tuck in the girls. He does and they come back upstairs at LEAST three times. I get so flustered as I am truly exhausted by this point and sometimes give up, letting Destiny fall asleep in my bed and Dannika in my comfy chair in our bedroom. I should fight this horrible habit of theirs and I know it will improve. It used to be better, but I've grown lax on this issue and now I am paying the price!

Anyone have some great and easy solutions? Devan is seriously my easiest. We just tuck him in and he is asleep. Dyllan is up late reading but I guess he is old enough to know when he SHOULD go to sleep, not that he always does! I have tried rewards from a treasure box for the girls. After they stay in their beds they get to pick a treasure the next day. It worked great about two to three times and then they decided they do not care about a treasure. Great! I really don't want to teach them that they get some THING every time they stay in their bed, rather when it is Ned time they just need to get in bed and stay there!

This too shall pass, I know, but when I am so mentally exhausted I just think it drives me crazy! I need a little time to me! I'm probably not supposed to admit that either- bit it is TRUE! I am the one with the kids all day long some days and when one of them needs your undivided attention 100% of the time I start to go a bit insane some days! Lately, by 8:00 pm every day.

Making Rainbows

2011-06-14T12:16:00.000-05:00

Dannika got all ready to go out and splash in the puddles this rainy day! She thought it would be a blast! She loved it, but as you can see from Destiny's expression she was not so sure about this whole adventure.

Dannika talked her into splashing in the puddle below. Dannika did most of the splashing that got Destiny a little wet.

Destiny did try her own splashing for a quick and fleeting moment. This picture is not good, but I was in a huge hurry to capture ONE of her by herself for I was afraid of what would happen next.

And sure enough, the grumpies came out and the boots came off. Destiny was not at all impressed with this puddle jumping business because she got wet!

Dannika got really wet. Not just a tiny bit, but rain puddle water pouring out of her boots kind of wet!

And she did not mind one bit! She loved every second of it.

She had a rainbow kind of day, regardless of the rain! This girl can make the best of most any situation IF she wants to! Today, she wanted to!

I have a pondering question today, does God give us tests to pass or fail, based upon our own free will and our choice in the situation? I am wondering if I have EVER passed these tests or if I always miserably fail. The true answer is probably the latter. Living in a small town brings unique challenges. Small town gossip is always rampid. I am sure I am often the brunt of that gossip, but really don't care. I just never know how to deal with the gossip. Do I just walk away? Should I just act bored? Should I just pray that stop talking that way? Should I open my mouth and say what I think? Should I tell them that this information sounds like gossip and that I would rather not ever hear it? YES - but I don't always do that. The sinful side of me wants to hear the gossip, but deep down I feel worse once I've heard it. I don't really believe it anyway, so why bother? I'm going to try to "not bother." I'm going to try to leave the situation. Try I may, but I don't know if I will succeed.

Best Friends

2011-06-10T15:08:00.000-05:00

Do you have that best friend in life? That one person who really knows you and puts up with you and is still there for you no matter what? I would have to say I had a couple best friends in high school, but that all seems to change. I left for an exchange year in Germany and after that high school stage of life, things just CHANGE. I went off to college, met new friends, met Shaine, and then my best friend was him. He still is my best friend, the one who really knows me, but he's not the girlfriend you just want to call on the phone for some nonsense. You probably know how it is. I used to have a best friend in my mom as well. She would call for nothing and somehow find out all the happenings in my life. She died shortly after Shaine and I were married and then I was a bit at a loss for that best friend. I really only had Shaine. It seems like friends move in and out of my life - when needs and circumstances change. I'm sure it is that way for everyone. We are constantly changing as people and my hobbies and hangouts change because of my children's activities. Sometimes, family just takes up so much of the time I have that I don't have the energy or effort to be a good friend. I need to make time - always think that, but hard to do when four children and a husband are always demanding something different from me!

About one year ago, a mom of one of Devan's friends, who I was "aquainted" with, asked me if I had ever gone to Vegas. I told her yes. She asked if I liked it and I told her it was ok. She asked if I would ever want to go again. I said sure, not thinking anything would really ever happen with that. You know how people ask random questions to make conversation and then it is dropped, yeah, that's what I thought would happen. Not this lady - she was planning and finding good prices and on the ball. I was thinking to myself, wow, she was really serious! I sure hope I can handle this person. I really don't know her at all. You may be laghing at me now, but... I'm serious. Here I was, about to take a 5 day trip with this person, and what if she was really annoying? What if she smelled bad? What if I hated the whole trip? I would be "stuck" in that situation for 5 long days! Luckily, that was not the case!

Steph has become a much needed friend in my life. I'm thankful that she puts up with me and my family and my Devan for sure. She is so thoughtful and caring and calls me "just to chat." She knows my schedule better than I do, because I can't keep up with it all any more! Schedules get too crazy and busy, but we try to find time to do something fun together. We need to go back to Vegas. I am still dreaming about Serendipity's Frozen Hot Chocolate. I talk to her about once a day, sometimes more, and I am just feeling so thankful for her today! She goes rummage saling for my kids. She is so willing to help out whenever she can. I just hope I am a good friend in return.

There are others that I should not "leave out" in the friend list, but too many to mention. Perhaps you will each get your own post. Of course, I would need pictures of you all then! Some seem to be a bit camera shy!

Thanks for being my friend!

Faith

2011-06-08T15:42:00.000-05:00

Whoopie Do! This may be our new favorite word at our house! Destiny and I were walking through Wal-Mart we saw these fun things and decided to try them. Easy to make and fun to say! They taste pretty good, too! Destiny likes the word more than the actual treats.

"Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." -Heberwes 11:1

I had someone ask me last weekend if I was always this religious - Now, that is a difficult question to answer. First off I thought YES - then later I am thinking, am I really that religious? Is that a compliment or a slam? I'm amazed that someone would think that of ME!~ I don't feel all that religious some days, but for sure, I have faith! I said yes, but I have not been as open about my religion until the past few years. Really, there was no need to be so OPEN. Most everyone knew my religion and what I believed and the rest asked if they wanted to know, but I didn't really talk about it. My life is like an open book, so you take it all or leave me alone. I have grown up with a strong faith. It has been ingrained into me since birth. I lived it every day of my life. I went to a religious grade school and then continued to go to church every Sunday and do all the "correct" things, so to say! Growing up in such a strict faith made me the way I am today. My life has been black and white. I still tend to look at most things that way, but now, I am not afraid to tell people that I may be praying for them or thinking of them, and I truly am!!!
Why would I have ever been scared to say that to someone before? I don't know... perhaps I was afraid of how they would react, or perhaps I just did not want to sound strange. I just didn't want to stand out as being "different." Well, I have now come to realize that we are all "different." God created each one of us unique and "different." So, if you don't believe in God, you still can't deny the fact that every human being is unique and their own individual person! How amazing is that in itself? As we go through the Cystic Fibrosis learning curve many people have said they are praying for us! Hooray! I think we can use all the prayers we can get! I welcome and covet your prayers. Many have said they are thinking of us = hooray! The more people who learn about this disease and "think of us" the next time they hear cystic fibrosis the better. Awareness is an awesome thing. Cuz' believe me, I was NOT aware before all of this happened to US!

So, am I now religious? Newly more religious? No = I am the same degree of religiousness I have always been. I will always try to fix my eyes upon the Lord. I do have a sense of calmness and acceptance through all of this (some days). He will not give us more than we can handle. (Yes, that is what I have to keep telling myself often. I wonder why He thinks I can handle so darn much though?) I see the blessings through the pain. I am in LOVE with Laura Story's new song, "Blessings." The song says what if blessings come through raindrops. Yeah, what if? Some days my blessings are coming through my tear drops, but I know that I AM blessed. Things could be so much worse. This life is a blessing and we will take one day at a time, living and being present, and BREATHING every moment. Just Breath - so true for us now. A blessing we took for granted and still do, but something I sure do think about more often now.

I also had a dear soul ask me to pray for her daughter on a specific day and for a specific thing. Now - I was honored to be asked. I don't think, until this year, I have ever been asked to pray specifically for someone. So, maybe because I am more open about my religion people are not afraid to talk to me about praying. What a blessing! AND believe me - we will be praying!

Here's our little peanut girl vesting it and Breathing her nebulizer. She is not quite herself these past few days. She is still a trooper, but not feeling 100%. I am guessing she is fighting some cold bug that many have. Destiny and I have been fighting a cold and I am sure she has gotten it now, too! Praying we can keep it under control without hospitalization. That just scares me!~

I have been writing all the "good stuff" towards the end of my blog posts. I don't want all the good stuff broudcast on facebook for people to just click 'like.' So, if you stick through it and read to the end that is where the meat of our story is! If you have not yet, sign up to be a follower under Networked Blogs on the right side bar of my blog. That way you can view the posts right away and you are notified when a new one is up. Sometimes, much easier for us busy people!

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." -2 Corinthians 4:18

Perfect Light

2011-06-07T11:50:00.000-05:00

I found it! One afternoon I pulled out the camera and tried to take some pictures of my kids playing play-dough. That did NOT work without a flash and I was simply too lazy to go get one. The day was a bit overcast and grey, but I found that perfect spot in my house where the light hits just right and the result was perfect. Granted, Destiny had no shirt on, but the hair was perfect, the face was perfect and the light was perfect!

Destiny has taken a few steps backwards with all this Cystic Fibrosis business. I realize how needy she still is, at the age of three. She does better when I am not around. Then, she is outgoing and funny and seems very sure of herself and what she wants. When I am around her she wants to be held, or be touching me constantly and begging to be held. She will be content on my lap for quite a while and she still sucks her thumb, as if a security blanket for her. She is getting heavy and that is just not always possible. I have found that when I pick her up from daycare - three days a week - I simply have to hold her in a chair for as long as she wants. The problem is, she wants it forever and I grow inpatient or rather all the things I have to do start formulating in my head and I am off to do them. I have supper to prepare for 6 people, therapy to do, a baseball game to attend, clothes to wash, clothes to fold and put away, a house to keep as clean as I can, so... I guess I am probably failing her. I am trying!! I try to hold her while I type and while I cook and while I do laundry, but I find myself setting her down more than holding her. Then, I think maybe her need for me to hold her is brought on by me giving in to that. I remember Dannika always wanting to be held as well, and I simply gave up - she grew too heavy and we learned how to do without. Destiny is a bit more needy - and I don't want to fail her or the bond we formed or are still forming and the list goes on... it is all a daily adjustment.

Today, however, we are off to the destist as Destiny has two cavities that I know of. Yikes! I am sure the enamel on her teeth is not as strong as it should be, perhaps due to malnurishment before she was born. I am hoping only two are there and not more. This could be an expensive trip to the destist. Today they are just doing a check up and then we have to go back for the actual fillings/caps/whatever the diagnosis is... we will see! We will see how brave she will be!

Affected!

2011-06-06T14:32:00.000-05:00

Just a quick cell phone picture of the tire girls as we were getting our oil changed at
WW Tire Service!~ Go figure...

The reality is finally setting in that Cystic Fibrosis is the true diagnosis. I guess it just takes awhile to accept it all and move onward and upward. I still think "thank goodness" we know what it is and have the proper treatments coming our way now! We are for sure still learning and she still has a low grade temp some days, so not sure what that is all about, but will have to ask and find out. I don't think the bacteria in her lungs is gone, by any means, so not sure if that is what is causing the fever or some other bug she has caught.

As she was playing at bible school, I see her surrounded by 50 other kids, and I imagine all the germs that are swarming around. That is now VERY SCAREY for this mom! I had a talk with her about trying to keep her distance from people who are sick or coughing, and she cried! She sobbed, "Now I won't have any friends." Poor little sweetie. I told her that would not be the case, and you just have to keep as healthy as you can. The worst was one it was time for her vest treatment and she told me she did not want to do it. She was perfectly calm and reasonable and just told me, "No. I don't want to do my vest today. I will just go to heaven. Heaven's really great mom and I think that would be good." Now, that hits a mom like a ton of bricks, bringing tears to my eyes, but she is perfectly right. Heaven is a great place, but ... I have been trying to teach her about keeping our bodies healthy and holy as a temple to the Lord. I think she's now ok with that whole idea. Talk about having the faith of a child. She's got it!!!!

I bought sanitizing wipes yesterday and need to do the whole house wipe down. I want to get all the stinkin' bacteria that is there. I know, that is probably not even possible, but I gotta do what I can, right? It's hard to say, "Kids will be kids," when I know every germ she comes in contact with could potentially mean 7-14 days in the hospital for her. So - if you think I'm psycho and crazy, you may be right, but I'm just gonna go with what I know for now. That is what parenting is all about. I am doing the best I know how to do at the time. So if there are better ideas out there I hope to learn them and gain more knowledge on how to extend my daughter's life the best I can, hopefully avoiding hospital stays. My plants are now sitting outside on my deck as I learned that mold grows in the dirt and can be harmful. Who need them anyway? I won't mind a bit not having to water them. So, if you drive by and see my front step array with dead house plants, you will know the Cystic Fibrosis Genes have hit our house!

I am impatiently awaiting the genetic testing for Dannika and Dyllan??? He is still our mystery. Praying the mutations are so weak that there will never be any issues. Still praying for healing and cures and knowing God can make all things possible, but also realizing that there must be a reason for all of this. We will endure and grow stronger and do great things because of this disease!

Devan, who is 10, and our only biological child NOT affected by the cf genes (he may be a carrier though), is most certainly affected!!! It affects us all in different ways. I can only ask those of you who know us to be patient. I don't mind the questions of:

How are things going?

What is Dannika's treatment?

How is your family doing?

How are you doing?

I know what it is like to want to do something, but not knowing what to do. I welcome your questions. I just can't guarantee how I will react. Some days that question may be met with tears and some days I may be feeling very strong and world conquering! Devan has started to turn inward - meaning he wants to be with US. He is my social butterfly child, so for him, this all means something so very different. He was with us when Dannika heard the news she had it and he learned he did not. I did not see that overwhelming sense of relief take him over, not one bit. I saw fear and dread and tears and questions in those ten year old eyes. Now, he finds out his brother has it as well, and why does he not? He is a quiet boy and for him to talk to us takes more than the others. I feel stretched for time and am trying to find that special one on one time with him, for he needs it, too. To say he is not affected and 'the healthy one' is not fair. His birthday wish for next month was for his brother and sister to be healthy. How fair is that? He did not want a new bike or any toy, but good health for others. Devan comes across as the the jokester in the family, but really, he is quiet and reflective about things that matter most to him. He is trying to determine on his own what this all means for him and when his friends are healthy enough to play inside and when he has to wash his hands and take off shoes and not drink or eat off other people's stuff and, and, and, ... I can only imagine.

Apple Enchiladas

2011-06-02T20:02:00.000-05:00

Dyllan's Social Studies Class had a food day where they had to make an entree, dessert or appetizer from a country that they drew. Dyllan and his classmate drew a dessert from Mexico and this is the result! Apple Emchiladas that were simply delicious and easy to make! Thanks to Mr. Johnson for such a fun project that I got to enjoy! I was so full after tasting all the great things. Of course, the apple enchiladas were my personal favorite, but they had some amazing egg rolls, a yummy toffee cheesecake, good old fashioned flap jacks and a tasty chicken pot pie. I am a sweets person though, so my vote is always for the sugar!!!

Apple Enchiladas

Serves 6 -

Prep Time: 10 minutes

Cook Time: 30 minutes

6 soft tortilla shells

2 cans Apple Pie Filling

1/2 Cup white sugar

1/2 Cup brown sugar

1/2 Cup water

1/2 Cup butter

1 tsp ground cinammon

Preheat Oven to 350 Degrees and grease a baking pan (we used a sheet cake pan)

Combine sugars and water and butter on stove and bring to a boil (we used the microwave)

Scoop 1/4 Cup of the apple pie filling into middle of tortillas

Tuck in edges and all sides to make a pouch. Place on greased pan with seam sides down. Sprinkle with cinammon.

Pour the cooked sauce over the top of tortillas and bake for 20 minutes until golden brown.

Let stand for 10 minutes before serving. They were great with a scoop of vanilla ice cream!